A hypnotherapist`s casebook

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Part 2:

" Can something be done on a subconscious level to develop one`s potential for psychic awareness?"

Yes.

" Will you now explain what that something is, please?"

...Don`t know how to develop...

" You don`t know what can be done subconsciously to develop psychic abilities, is that right?"

Yes.

" Subconscious, one of the principles I work by in my hypnotherapy is that `The conscious mind decides, and the subconscious mind brings to fruition.` This only holds true, of course, in the case of a conflict regarding a pattern of behaviour, when the conscious mind understands enough to make an informed decision as to whether that pattern of behaviour should continue in the individual`s life. Would you accept that principle under those circumstances?"

Yes.

" OK. Would you accept that principle in another context; that of the conscious mind wishing to develop the psychic abilities of the individual?"

No.

" Why?"

...What the subconscious doesn`t know...the conscious can`t know...so can`t decide...

I sighed with frustration. The logic of what Janette`s subconscious was saying was perfectly consistent. I had met this kind of cul-de-sac reasoning before (with `The Guillotine Lady`, see next chapter). It made sense, but it seemed impossible to get information about such matters that could then be independently verified. I was willing to carry on a little longer, though our session was now half over, and I wanted to tie-up the loose ends of the overweight problem, which after all was what Janette was paying me for.

" Subconscious mind, would I be able to transmit a message to you telepathically now?"

No.

" Is there anything I could do here and now to transmit information on a psychic level?"

No.

" Does information which is received by you psychically transcend the laws of time and space as science understands them?"

Yes.

" Is it possible, then, to receive information telepathically from the future?"

No.

" Is distance any barrier as far as the telepathic reception of information is concerned?"

No.

" Are premonitions real phenomena that occur on a psychic level, subconscious?"

Yes.

Despite my frustrations, I felt rather disappointed by the contradiction this comment created.

" Do you receive information from the future, subconscious?"

No.

" Could you if you wanted to?"

No.

" Explain to me now, subconscious mind, why you were able to receive information direct from Sean`s subconscious mind at the time of his car accident."

...There is a bond...That`s how she knows...The future`s not there...but the past has been...They are just close...

" The past and the future are just close?"

No.

" What are just close, subconscious?"

...Sean and Janette...That`s how she knows...

" The past has created that bond between them, is that right?"

Yes.

I felt that I could make little further progress in the matter, so I moved on to the topic of overweight and concluded the treatment in what remained of the session.

When I brought Janette out of hypnosis, she was delighted with the insights she`d received. I asked her if she believed anyway in telepathy and psychic phenomena.

" Yes, I do believe it happens. But it`s only been a belief; up until the thing with Sean`s car, I`d never experienced it myself."

" Can you throw any light on what the subconscious has been telling us?"

" Only that I feel everyone`s born the same, with the same psychic potential, but in some it comes out more than in others. I think what the subconscious meant by telepathic communication is just being aware of what comes into your head..."

" But they could be thoughts generated within the mind itself," I pointed out.

" Yes," Janette said with a smile, " but the world is stranger than we know."

And I for one could certainly not disagree with her on that score.

*

To date, Averil has been my most complex and extensive case. She came to me initially with a travel phobia, which we dealt with in four sessions. During the course of our discussions - at the consultation and subsequently during our `chat time` after relaxations - it emerged that Averil also suffered from a number of other problems, which she came to realise could be dealt with effectively through hypnotherapy.

" From what you say, Steve, you might be able to help me with my arthritis?"

" I`ve cured arthritis in the past," I told her. " Arthritis, like the vast majority of `disorders` (to use Averil`s term) is a pattern of behaviour created for reasons the subconscious mind believes are valid and necessary. Treatment follows the same course as your travel phobia: we find out the reason behind the manifestation of the symptoms; we find the belief that gave rise to the reason; then we find the incidents that were put together to create that belief. When the adult, mature conscious mind reviews and reassesses that information, it realises that it`s based on outdated interpretations - which is to say, childlike interpretations that were laid down in the early years of life. This is not a hard-and-fast rule, however..."

I told Averil about Lilian (not using her real name), a lady in her seventies whose asthma had been created five years ago by the death of her beloved dog and her perceived inability to grieve.

" But the process of change-through-realisation is the same. Once both parts of the mind are communicating about a disorder that`s causing a conflict, then the abilities of the intelligent conscious mind are brought into play, and the conflict can usually be resolved quite quickly. So although I - and no sensible hypnotherapist - could offer a guarantee of success, once we`ve gained the co-operation of the subconscious mind, results can swiftly follow. So, Averil, you have a problem with arthritis?"

" I do," she admitted, " and I`ve got a few others too..."

And she reeled them off:- chronic ache in left shoulder, arthritis, asthma, backache, dizziness, eczema on the neck and behind the knees, intense fear feelings and panics, fear of fire, fear of heights, fear of being sick, migraines, `nerves`, overheating of the body, recurrent nightmares, recurrent pins-and-needles on the left side, rhinitis, short-sightedness, stomach trouble...

" And an unpleasant pain under my left toes. If you can help me with just a few of these, it would make my life so much easier."

When Averil first came to see me, she was on a regime of a dozen different drugs, including Nardil, an antidepressant so powerful that it could only be prescribed by her consultant psychiatrist. Some of the drugs were being taken to counteract the unpleasant side-effects of her other medicines, and I wondered at the time if any studies had ever been undertaken into the long-term effects of the chemical cocktail she was putting into her body.

I explained to Averil that, if she went ahead with treatment for these disorders, it would take some time, probably months, to resolve them.

" One of the first things I`ll do, once you`ve decided on the `order of play,` as it were, is to establish whether links exist between any of the problems you`ve mentioned. We can make much quicker progress that way - because if, say, two or three of the disorders are connected by common contributory incidents, once the subconscious has released those incidents, we can probably resolve all of the linked disorders simultaneously. Also, in any case, when we`ve successfully dealt with a few of the most intrusive problems, the subconscious will realise and appreciate the important principle of empowerment-through-release...By allowing us to understand why it created patterns of behaviour, and by then subsequently resolving the conflict of those patterns, the subconscious will come to see that it`s `doing the right thing.` And so the more minor disorders should tumble like dominoes...Although Averil, as they say, pride comes before a fall!"

I grinned as I said this, but we both knew then that we`d give it a go. I was convinced that hypnotherapy could help Averil considerably, having verified my methods with hundreds of previous clients: but we were under no illusions that the treatment overall might be long, and not without its difficulties.

As it turned out, we got to be bottom of all of the difficulties listed above - though at the time of writing the short-sightedness is still improving, according to tests carried out by Averil`s optometrist. And some of her disorders did occur in `clumps`, many of them connected with incidents which occurred when Averil was just months old and a baby in her pram. At the time, the War was on and Averil`s father was engaged in secret work for the War Office. The neighbours, not knowing this, believed that Averil`s father was a coward who had simply decided not to fight. Consequently, in an act of petty vindictiveness I still find hard to believe, they had stood in their garden and thrown things at little Averil in her pram. This so-called Pram Incident occurred at least four times, and as the, memories began to emerge, Averil reported feeling `little hands touching my face...Baby hands touching my face. They were my hands, trying to soothe the hurt from the missiles that had struck me...`

Significantly, the missiles had come from the left: Averil`s migraines always began on the left; her short-sightedness was particularly acute in the left eye; her aching shoulder was the left one; her pins-and-needles only affected her left side; some of her arthritis problem occurred on the left (her subconscious had created arthritis three times in her body, based on three separate sets of incidents in her life), and so on. The release of the Collective Pram Incident was the breakthrough we needed to resolve the worst of Averil`s ailments.

Not all were connected with that wartime ordeal, however. Averil herself told me that she`d had `an incident-prone life,` which had involved two nervous breakdowns, spells in mental institutions, and the death of her mother and second husband from cancer.

The full story of Averil`s hypnotherapy and journey to wellness is told in a book we have written called The Inner Twin. Fortunately, Averil kept an extensive journal of her treatment, including the vivid recollections she experienced as part of the subconscious mind`s release of information. Most of these releases occurred between sessions, which was not ideal for us - but you can`t argue with or bully the subconscious into doing things just to suit your own agenda!

At the start of each session, Averil would present me with her week`s journal notes, which updated me on the good-work-for-change her subconscious mind was undertaking.

On one occasion, the journal extracts arrived through the mail a couple of days before our session. And upon reading them I was astonished to learn that Averil had come to believe she`d been responsible for the death of her second husband, Eric, who`d died of a brain tumour some years before.

What astonished me utterly as I read on was that Averil felt she`d caused Eric`s death by directly influencing his subconscious mind telepathically, triggering the cells of his brain to become cancerous.

This is the Journal entry Averil made at the time (she had not realised any of the Pram Incidents at this point):-

My stabs of fear in the past few weeks are absolutely identical to this real-life experience, including their increasing intensity. From what I`ve learnt from my hypnotherapy, I would suspect that Eric is not the original cause of the fear, but was reinforcing an earlier trauma...

Or would I? Could I possibly have brought about his brain tumour? Yes, I could; and I did kill him...

I`ve always said that the tumour killed him, not that he died from it. But it was I who really killed him, and the tumour was my weapon.

And if I didn`t kill Eric, then she, the subconscious, did. When I was about to marry Dick and put myself in further danger, she`d given me a panic attack (Fear!), but I still went ahead and married him; so she increased the fear symptoms to such an extent that I became ill enough to go into hospital. This quite easily rid her/me of the threat of Dick, as he left while I was still in there. But Eric was more of a problem, and it took another twenty-five years, and a great deal of fear for me, before we could be rid of him.

I feel no guilt or even remorse. My sole motive in killing Eric was fear. We had, and still have, a very deep bond, however badly we may have treated each other. We did, and still do, love each other deeply.

When Averil came for her session, she was understandably sheepish and embarrassed, since she knew my non-mystical views about how the mind worked.

" I know you`re going to argue with all of this - and my conscious mind knows it`s totally ridiculous - but it came to me with the same force of conviction as other information that we`ve used to cure some of my disorders. I know it`s right: I can`t prove it, but I`m convinced of it..."

Fundamentally as far as Averil`s treatment was concerned, her conviction was not a problem: the rule one uses is that the therapist works with the beliefs of the client. It was not my job to contradict Averil or to try and `argue her round` to a more rational viewpoint. In fact, her rational / analytical conscious mind was already admitting how absurd her conviction was! She didn`t need to be told as much from me.

So the treatment continued, and led not very long afterwards to the similar conviction that Averil had also used direct subconscious communication to trigger the cancer that killed her mother.

Her journal entry pinpoints the occasion:-

The realisation came strongly into my mind that I myself had caused my mother`s death. Only five days ago this same thought had suddenly come to me - but I had consciously refused to accept it. It was now as if my Other Self had seen fit to repeat this truth, one which is somehow far more painful than to think I was responsible for Eric`s death.

By this time, Averil had been coming to see me for over six months on a more-or-less weekly basis. Thus far the treatment had progressed steadily and with no unusual surprises. These new revelations concerned me in a number of ways - though not because of fear that Averil might punish herself through guilt. She said to very definitely that in neither case, Eric`s or her mother`s, did she feel fear or remorse for the actions of her subconscious mind.

Part of my concern, I admit, was due to my relative inexperience in dealing with people who displayed delusional beliefs of a bizarre nature...But then another part of me came back strongly - Who is to say what`s delusional and what`s not? To make that automatic assumption was to contravene one of my basic working principles, of allowing the client herself to learn through the release of information from the subconscious.

Because Averil herself was keen to know more about what she was calling direct subconscious communication, we spent part of one session questioning the subconscious on the matter...

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

But then Averil indicated No, consciously. My concern was that the `knowledge` that she had wished her husband and mother dead, and then it had occurred, was a terrible burden to bear. In hypnotherapy I use the legal definition of guilt, which is the intention to harm, followed by the enacting of that harm. That is true guilt - which fits the bill if Averil truly believed what she was claiming had happened.

Ambiguous IMR.

Yes.

Ambiguous IMR.

There was a huge amount more that we could have done to `test` Averil`s subconscious beliefs; and at that time thoughts were going through my mind of the experiments in telepathy and other E.S.P. phenomena carried out in the 1920s and `30s by the researcher J.B. Rhine. I wondered whether anyone had researched the links between telepathy and the hypnotic state, or had investigated such phenomena in hypnotised subjects. But even as the idea occurred to me, I dismissed it as not being appropriate at that time: Averil was here to find cures for her disorders, and since the belief in subconscious communication was not a problem to her, it had no place in our plan of approach for her treatment. Perhaps other opportunities would present themselves to study the idea further...

But I did ask Averil`s subconscious mind where and when it received the information that led it to create the belief in subconscious communication. And the answer, as I expected, was to be found in the Inner Twin.

*

Chapter 8: Migraines And The Guillotine Lady.

It always troubles me when I see people offering `Regression Hypnosis`, often in the small ads of local newspapers next to Tarot readings, visiting massage services and dateline clubs. Such `regressions` almost invariably amounts to an attempt by the `therapist` to take you back to previous lives, where you can relive experiences of your former selves, work through your bad karma (man), and reach a resolution of your conflicts in this life.

The problem with such therapists is that they make the enormous and potentially damaging assumption that past lives and reincarnation are facts - and will thus load the subconscious mind of their clients with suggestions reflecting that belief. Hypnotherapy works by drawing useful learnings and understandings from the client: the whole purpose of the hypnotherapist is to facilitate that process, and any suggestions made are and should be subservient to that aim. Whether or not any individual client believes in reincarnation, no competent hypnotherapist should assume the existence of that phenomenon when they begin moving towards a resolution of the problem.

In proper hypnotherapy, the term regression has quite another meaning, which is to allow the subject to relive incidents she experienced at some earlier time in her life. The very first time I was hypnotised (see P ), part of the session involved a regression suggestion - which was to go back to some pleasant event when I was a very young child...

Instantly, the memory came forward of my parents` living room in the house in South Wales where I grew up. I was very young, maybe two or three, and I found myself sitting on the carpet in front of the tiled grate I`d not thought about for well over thirty years. Right before me were two metal spinning tops, favourite toys at the time. They were the kind you had to pump to make spin, and although I could work the smaller top, the larger one was too unwieldy for me to operate.

Without any warning, a big hand and forearm came into the view, took hold of the large spinning top and pumped it up to speed: I recall it made a whirring, fluttery kind of noise as it twirled in front of my eyes. Then I looked around over my right shoulder, and there was my Dad, looking absolutely enormous as he smiled down at me, his little boy...

The experience ended and my thoughts drifted on to other things - but the experience, offered up by the subconscious at Helen Lesser`s prompting, had been startlingly vivid, very pleasant, and deeply nostalgic.

Anyone can learn self-hypnosis techniques quickly and easily, and use them to evoke equally striking and enjoyable memories. Some hypnotherapists routinely use age regression to allow clients to understand incidents relevant to the problems brought for treatment. Personally I prefer to use recollection, which allows clients to review and understand incidents without the necessity of re-experiencing them. This is because unpleasant emotions were often experienced at the time the contributory incidents took place. For a review and resolution of those incidents to occur, it`s necessary for the adult conscious mind to understand their significance, but not to endure them all over again in Technicolour 3D Surroundsound Cinemascope!

Another important point to make is that one of the fundamental functions of the subconscious mind is to put information together to create the `map of reality` I talked about in the Introduction. In a very real sense, the subconscious is the ultimate storyteller; and what we call Reality is very largely composed of the beliefs we created due to our unique and subjective perceptions of things that once happened to us. The subconscious makes things up from information received, and in childhood especially, views of reality can be created from information which is entirely fictitious and fantastical.

Furthermore, during treatment at the hands of a so-called regression therapist, if the pressure is on for the client to come up with past-life scenarios, then the subconscious will often eagerly oblige, delving into its memory bank of Hollywood Biblical epics and history books and TV period dramas for material. Every novelist and playwright knows the power of the subconscious when it comes to spinning yarns. We all have the ability to do it, to a greater or lesser extent, and so under `regression hypnosis` what tends to happen is the creation of a Gordian Knot, rather than the unravelling of a tangle of outdated beliefs.

However, just once in a while, past life regressions occur spontaneously. And this happened to me with a client I`ll call Shirley, who came with the problem of migraines...

" I`ve had the migraines for thirty years," Shirley told me. She was smiling and seemed cheerful, but underneath I saw the tiredness of too much pain, which is a feature of many of the clients who, having tried most other things, eventually get round to hypnotherapy.

" I`ve tried painkillers, stronger and stronger ones, but they don`t have much effect. And I`ve had herbal treatments too, which helped for awhile. I had a brain scan - thinking the worst! - but it was clear. So here I am, hoping you can help me..."

" Well, if the subconscious is willing to co-operate, Shirley," I told her, " we`ll be in with a very good chance."

" I can`t imagine feeling well again," she said with a little smile that was trying hard not to be hopeful.

" At the moment you don`t have to try to imagine it - You don`t have to try to do anything at all: just go along with my words now as you quickly realise how easily you`re able to relax..."

At the end of the session, Shirley reported that she hadn`t felt very relaxed, and that in any case she didn`t relax very well. However, she was surprised at `how fast the time went,` which is one indication that hypnosis has been achieved, since during one`s involvement with the inner landscape of the mind, one`s awareness of time passing externally becomes subdued. In short, you`re not paying attention to it.

I told Shirley not to worry about how relaxed she thought she`d been, since useful work can be done if only a light stage of hypnosis is achieved. Actually, the subconscious can be accessed without hypnosis at all as it`s usually understood - for instance by evoking `the part that watches wisely,` but at that point in my practice I had not learned this elegant technique, and was wondering if we would be successful at all in Shirley`s case...

I gave her my usual relaxation tape, and she booked up to begin the treatment itself. When I saw her the following week, she said that the tape `hadn`t made much difference.`

" You mean, to your ability to relax?"

" To my migraines," she corrected me.

" Shirley, the purpose of the tape is to allow you to practise the routine of relaxing I use during treatment. It`s not meant to do anything for the migraines directly."

" Well, I bought one of these hypnosis tapes you can get: it was supposed to cure migraines..."

" And it didn`t work, right?"

" I thought it helped me a little: it suggested a bright white light was bathing my head in soothing, healing rays to ease away the pain of the migraine."

" Visualisations like this can be helpful," I pointed out. " But the best way to get relief is to negotiate with the subconscious to turn down the pain-symptom while we`re moving towards the resolution of the problem. I then sometimes use a visualisation to allow the conscious mind to instruct the subconscious as to how far it wants the pain turning down. Most suggestion tapes just aren`t sophisticated enough to go through this process: you really need a hypnotherapist actually there to do the negotiation."

On this occasion, for reasons that never became clear, Shirley relaxed very deeply. The subconscious agreed to co-operate, and during the session released an incident where Shirley`s mother said something to her in anger. Shirley was a little girl when this incident took place, and felt then and now that the words were not justified. Although we negotiated with the subconscious to minimise unpleasant emotions, Shirley began to cry quietly during the hypnosis.

" Shirley," I said to her, speaking softly but firmly, " you can step aside from this if you want to. You can imagine the scene playing on a TV, or through a window. You don`t need to be there and experience it again...Or you can come out of hypnosis now if you wish. Would you like to do that?"

She shook her head slowly and the release continued.

The relaxation ended shortly afterwards anyway. As Shirley came to full wakefulness, she took a tissue from out of her sleeve and dabbed at her eyes.

" I was a little terror," she said with a mischievous grin. " I gave my Mum hell after she`d shouted at me, because I thought what she`d said wasn`t fair..."

Her smile faded and her eyes moistened up again.

" Are you able to talk to your Mum about this?" I wondered.

" No, she`s not around any more. Maybe that`s part of the problem. I can`t tell her it`s OK, I forgive her now - even if she was wrong to shout at me!"

" Maybe you can`t tell her in one sense. But within yourself you can still make that act of forgiveness. And depending on your spiritual beliefs, perhaps that message will reach her."

" Oh, I`m sure it will," Shirley said cheerfully. " I certainly believe that we don`t end when we die."

I agreed with her, and soon the conversation moved on. At the time, I had no idea of how significant Shirley`s passing comment was to be.

Two further sessions brought out other incidents that the subconscious mind indicated had contributed to the maintenance of the migraine behaviour. But all of these incidents had occurred in Shirley`s teens or afterwards. And when we asked for an understanding of the incident that first set the mind on the path to the creation of the migraines, the Yes / No response faded and co-operation was not forthcoming.

I guessed that the subconscious was experiencing some difficulty in co-operating over that first incident; that there was a conflict preventing its easy release. The presentation of further rationales allowed a previously unreleased incident to come forward, however; when Shirley`s father, in a drunken rage, had waved a knife in front of his children.

Again Shirley cried as the memories came to her. So I asked her conscious mind to become very involved in imagining a place that was comfortable, pleasant and safe, and used the rest of the session to negotiate with the subconscious to turn down the migraine pain over the coming weeks as we moved towards resolution.

During our after-relaxation chat, Shirley expressed some optimism that the hypnotherapy was working. The father-with-knife incident had never been hidden from her conscious mind; and actually she recalled it fairly often. But she could see now how her father`s behaviour - his drunkenness was a not-infrequent occurrence - could have `given her a headache.`

My own view is that these kinds of metaphors, used for example by Louise L. Hay in her book You Can Heal Your Life, can be accurate and insightful if they are supported by understandings gleaned with the help of the subconscious mind in individual cases. To suggest that because someone has been a real headache in life causes migraines, is a generalisation and a naive simplification.

However, I was glad that Shirley felt progress was being made. As she left she told me she thought there was more, that we hadn`t yet got to the heart of the problem. And to me, that seemed like a much more profound comment than the fact that Dad had given her a headache!

*

Shirley was very pleased to retort when she next saw me that she`d suffered no migraine pain at all in the past week; although she had been feeling edgy and didn`t quite know why.

I recalled what my first tutor, David Lesser, had said - that a client`s emotional emphasis will often change as the nub of the problem is approached. This may take the form of confidence and a lessening of the symptoms, or indeed the opposite. In this event, a crucial point has been reached in the course of the treatment, one where the client, fearing that hypnotherapy is making things worse, will give up and cancel her remaining appointments.

Shirley reassured me there was no danger of that, but that she wasn`t enjoying feeling so uneasy about things.

Again she relaxed wonderfully, and this time I asked the subconscious to communicate with me by using the voice.

" Subconscious mind, we hope you have you considered the ethos of our questioning - that we aren`t here to criticise the migraines you`ve created for Shirley. We accept that you do things for good reasons; reasons you believe to be helpful and true. Our aim is to understand those reasons, and the circumstances that led you to create and maintain the pattern of behaviour that has brought her for treatment. Please be assured of that...Subconscious, have you considered the points I`ve just put to you - the same points I made during our first relaxation together?"

Yes.

" And do you accept our assurances in this matter?"

Yes.

" That`s fine. Now subconscious, we are grateful for the co-operation you`ve offered so far with regard to the migraines. Did the incidents that you`ve revealed to conscious-Shirley contribute towards the creation and maintenance of the migraines in her life?"

Yes.

" I see. Does any one of the incidents you`ve so far revealed constitute the incident that first set you on the path to the creation of migraines in Shirley`s life?"

No.

" Are you prepared to allow Shirley to know and understand the significance of the first incident I`ve just referred to?"

Yes.

" That`s good, thank you. Subconscious, with regard to that first incident, were any unpleasant emotions experienced by Shirley at the time?"

No.

" Right. Given your agreement in this matter, I now ask you to allow Shirley a full and complete understanding of the first incident we`ve been discussing in the most effective way you know how. Go ahead now with my thanks, and use Shirley`s voice to communicate to me anything you feel it will be useful for me to know..."

...She`s...three...

Shirley began speaking after just a few seconds, very slowly and sluggishly. I could see that she was deeply relaxed, almost to the point where the words were unrecognisably slurred.

" Subconscious mind, please make full use of Shirley`s voice and all of the muscles and mechanisms creating and controlling that voice. Shirley herself can remain as pleasantly relaxed as she is now while you go about this work...You`ve indicated that at the time the first incident occurred, Shirley was three years old?"

...No...Three months...

" I see. Please describe for me the circumstances of this incident which occurred when Shirley was three months old."

...In a room...Tall...window...

" Were you alone in this room at the time of the incident we`re discussing?"

...Yes...No...

A look of puzzlement had come over Shirley`s face at this point, together with a certain agitation. Her breathing had changed, and the fingers of her left hand were twitching, quite subconsciously, like a reflex reaction.

" Subconscious, are you happy and comfortable to continue describing the incident we`re discussing?"

Yes.

" Go ahead then."

...He came in...I smiled...I said...I`m going to kill him...

" Subconscious mind, is it right that you were three months old when the incident we`re discussing occurred?"

...No...

" Does conscious-Shirley have a vivid impression of the incident we`re now discussing?"

Yes.

" Does conscious-Shirley understand how you`ve used the incident we`re discussing to create migraines in her life?"

No.

" Are you prepared to allow her that understanding right now?"

Yes.

" Thank you subconscious..."

I asked the subconscious mind to communicate the understanding, and because I could see that Shirley still seemed agitated by what was happening, I brought her out of hypnosis (although this was something she could effortlessly have done herself, or which would have happened spontaneously anyway, just as one startles out of a bad dream or a daydream that becomes unpleasant).

As she came back to full wakefulness, Shirley`s look of astonishment grew. There were tears in her eyes but also a disbelieving smile on her face.

" Are you all right?"

" That," she said, fumbling for a tissue, " was the most frightening thing that`s ever happened to me!"

This concerned me considerably, of course: I take great pains to explain to clients that the techniques I use in hypnotherapy seek to minimise the experience of unpleasant emotions: I use recollection rather than regression; and I steer clear of the so-called abreactions that many hypnotherapists and psychotherapists employ. An abreaction is the re-experiencing or reliving of an anxiety-arousing situation from the past, which has been repressed within the mind. The thinking behind this is `cleansing through confronting,` but I find it to be an unnecessary process and not especially `customer friendly.` The fact that Shirley had obviously been through such an unpleasant experience that we had not anticipated troubled me, and I said so.

" But Steve," she explained, " I wasn`t scared as the memory came back to me - it was only as I realised what an awful person I`d been that I became frightened."

" Will you tell me about it? I was confused: I thought the first incident happened when you were three months old - But how could that have been right if you said something to someone who came into the room...?"

Shirley waved her hand as though to brush the comment aside, and she was looking beyond me, as though seeing the experience all over again.

" Well, yes, I was confused too, for a time...I was three months old, and sitting in a high chair in the dining room...But then things became blurred, and when I was aware of what was happening again, I realised I was a man - "

" You were a man? Was this some kind of dream sequence?"

" No, I knew absolutely that it was me as I`d been in a previous life..."

I groaned inwardly at this complication - though I was curious, too, to know why the subconscious had come up with this information.

" I was a very arrogant man," Shirley went on. " Arrogant and vindictive...I was standing in a large ornate room panelled in dark wood, oak I think. I was looking out through a high arched window over a courtyard that was packed with people. In the middle of the courtyard was a guillotine, and there was a prisoner about to be executed... It was a public beheading..."

" Did you get any sense of where and when this incident was taking place?"

" I think...I guess it was in France, and at the end of the Eighteenth Century, or early in the Nineteenth...My job was to give the final order for the executions to go ahead."

Shirley gave a brittle laugh. " I enjoyed the work...A flunky came in and I smiled as I looked at him and pointed out the window at the prisoner. I said, `I`m going to kill him,` and then I went ahead and gave the order to the flunky...That`s what frightened me, to think I could have been capable of such an evil act...I felt elation, Steve. As the man giving that order, I felt elation...It`s nothing, is it? It`s got to be just imagination!"

" I don`t think that`s the point. It`s all to do with beliefs. If there`s a weight of belief in the subconscious mind that this incident really did happen to you, then we`ve got to

work with that and use it to move towards a resolution of the migraines...Tell me, do you happen to believe in reincarnation, Shirley?"

" Well yes, I do. But it`s not something I`ve ever really thought about seriously. I just thought that there must be more to it all than just this one life."

" OK," I said, noticing that our session-time was almost over anyway. " We`ll leave it there for today..."

" Do you think my subconscious is deliberately making things up - to avoid telling us the truth, or something?"

" Well I guess that`s possible, although my experience has been that if the subconscious agrees to co-operate, then it does so honestly, and as effectively as it can given the questions we ask of it. Equally, if it doesn`t wish to co-operate, then it will say so...In which case, there`s a reason why it won`t allow understandings to come forward. When this happens I say, ` Is there a part of you, then, subconscious mind, that objects to co-operating with us?` Usually the answer is Yes. So then I ask to talk to the part that objects - "

" But if it`s not co-operating, it won`t want to speak to you!"

" If that happens, I have various rationales I can put to it. One of them goes something like this: ` I`m assuming, subconscious-part-that-objects, that you have an important job to do in (client`s) life. You must have, to set yourself in opposition to the wishes of the conscious mind, and of the rest of the subconscious, which is willing to co-operate. Will you at least let us know just what function you perform in (client`s) life?` That, and other arguments, most often encourages the objecting part to start talking. The point is that the part-that-objects knows that a conflict exists between the pattern of behaviour that`s been subconsciously created, and the conscious wish to be rid of the problem the symptoms embody. Conflicts soak up energy and important mental and physical resources of the individual. We can use that idea also as a rationale to open up communication. It`s not often, once I`ve contacted the subconscious, that I fail to obtain a beneficial release of information...

" But anyway, I`m straying off the point. My own opinion is that the subconscious doesn`t cunningly lie; it`s not deceitful - although I have to say that my first hypnotherapy tutor took the opposite view, and constantly cross-checked information to make sure it was logically consistent. But there we are; he gets cures his way, I get them my way. And as I say, Shirley, you now relax wonderfully well, and your subconscious is responsive. So, if you`re happy to carry on with the treatment, we`ll see where the subconscious leads us..."

*

Before our next session I read up a little on the topic of past lives and reincarnation, and found the works of Jeffrey Iverson, Joe Fisher and Joe Keeton to be especially helpful and interesting (see Bibliography for these and other titles). I also learned more about Dr Ian Stevenson`s researches: Stevenson specialises in child reincarnation cases - which is to say, recollections by children of past lives; places, people and events. The importance of these cases, so the argument goes, is that a child`s mind before s/he is, say, six or seven has not been `contaminated` by information from this life. That is to say, the youngster`s map of reality is not sophisticated enough to create a fantasy of sufficient detail and consistency to fool an adult.

Even though the cases I read about were fascinating and offered compelling evidence for reincarnation, even people like Dr Stevenson, with years of experience in the field, seemed not to consider the idea proven beyond doubt. And as I had said to Shirley, we could only resolve conflicts within the framework of each individual client`s beliefs: whether those beliefs have anything to do with `objective` reality is another question.

When Shirley came for her next session, I spent some of the relaxation time verifying the information we had previously obtained. The subconscious confirmed that `The Guillotine Incident` had been the one which first set the mind on the path to the creation of the migraine headaches. Further questioning elicited the response that the migraines had been created in this life as a criticism of Shirley`s past (ie, previous life) cruelties, and were being maintained as a punishment, the nature of the punishment to Shirley echoing the punishments she doled out to the victims of the guillotine.

Finding this out - and assuming the information was correct - produced something of a difficulty. Normally patterns of behaviour are created to protect the individual, or to prevent some kind of harm, or as a warning. Punishments and criticisms are rarer, but they are also not amenable to the same rationales. For instance, in such cases even if the subconscious agreed that the individual as a whole could live more happily and successfully when all parts of the mind co-operated, because it was inflicting a punishment it might not be persuaded to let go of it even when the conscious mind fully understood the pattern of behaviour and made an informed decision favouring disposal.

There was also the question of guilt. One rationale that can be offered to a client`s subconscious when guilt is revealed to be a factor in the maintenance of a pattern of behaviour, is that true guilt stems from the intention to harm, then acting to carry out that intention. Very often, once the subconscious has considered this idea, it realises that although harm might have been done to some other person, there was no intention to inflict it. Thus, guilt is inappropriate, and an act of self-forgiveness becomes more likely.

In Shirley`s case she - as a man alive nearly two hundred years ago - was guilty in the true sense, according to the structure of morality she now carried with her in this life. And, of course, because she was guilty she needed to be punished.

One useful breakthrough occurred when Shirley`s subconscious confirmed that the migraines stemmed from self-criticism...

" Subconscious mind, are you, then, punishing conscious-Shirley in this life purely for actions carried out in a previous life of hers?"

Yes.

" I see. But until very recently Shirley had absolutely no knowledge of her previous lives - Is that correct?"

Yes.

" And so she had no idea at all as to why she had the migraines. Indeed, she hadn`t even realised that the migraines served as a punishment for her, is that right?"

Yes.

" OK...Tell me, subconscious, did the prisoners whom Shirley had executed in her previous life know why they were being punished?"

Yes.

" Would you agree, subconscious, that Shirley`s actions in her previous life - the actions that have prompted you to create the punishment of migraines - were barbaric?"

Yes.

" I agree with your view, subconscious. But even though the punishment by guillotine was barbaric, the prisoners knew why they were being punished. Is that so?"

Yes.

The direction of my questions was plain, I felt, but I stopped short of suggesting that the subconscious had been less civilised than `previous-Shirley` by not allowing her to understand why she was being punished. Instead, I changed tack.

" Subconscious, do you agree that you, the subconscious self, and the conscious aspect of the mind, actually form one indivisible whole?"

Yes.

" So is it the case that by punishing conscious-Shirley you are also punishing yourself?"

Yes.

" I see. And, since Shirley has just one mind, does the self-criticism of the conscious part also extend to you, the subconscious?"

The response was ambiguous, and Shirley`s facial expression changed then, and she became more agitated. I hoped that the subconscious could now see the nature of the paradox and the conflict that it had created for itself, and that the only resolution would be to end the punishment by understanding that conscious-Shirley had, in this life, done nothing to deserve it.

My questioning proceeded along these lines for a while, until it became clear that the subconscious was not willing to let go of the self-criticism, despite agreeing that Shirely was not at fault, not guilty of harming others in her present life.

With this tough nut yet to be cracked, I ended the session.

Shirley came out of hypnosis without tears this time; indeed, with what was almost a wry smile on her face.

" My subconscious really didn`t like you asking the questions this time."

" I`m sure it didn`t. Although subconscious logics and conscious common-sense don`t always tally, I can`t see how the subconscious can logically sustain your punishment when it concedes that current-conscious-you had no part to play in executing those prisoners."

Shirley shrugged almost casually. " But who can my subconscious punish, if not me, now?"

" That`s like kicking your car because the garage mechanic didn`t service it properly."

" Are you saying I`m like a car!"

I chuckled. " No. I`m saying that to hit out at whatever`s near to you, when the blame lies elsewhere, isn`t logical, and serves no useful purpose."

" Try telling my subconscious mind that!"

" I just did. It hears what you hear."

Shirley nodded, then frowned. " You said both parts of the mind are really one whole mind. And yet you treat the subconscious as though it was different..."

" Imagine it this way - that the mind is like an open stretch of water; a big lake. We`ll call one end, quite near the shore, the conscious mind: the rest of the lake we`ll call the subconscious. Conditions at the conscious-end might be quite different from those at the subconscious-end: different depths, different temperatures, different kinds of fish and plant life...It`s all one lake, but if you swam from one end to the other, you`d soon notice how things had changed.

" I think of the conscious mind as paying attention to the present. The here-and-now is alive, moment by moment, in the conscious mind. In the subconscious, it`s the past that`s alive - everything that`s ever happened to you, all that you`ve ever thought, active in that bustling map of reality. When we go there to visit, which hypnosis allows us to do, although we`re dealing with the same individual, we - conscious-you and I - soon notice the differences. We`ve swum in some ways into unfamiliar waters."

" So the subconscious mind is deep," Shirley said, smiling at her pun.

" Oh yes. But possibly not deeper than we can know..."

*

Between our sessions, I thought some more about the approach I might take in allowing Shirley to resolve her problem of migraines, working within the framework of beliefs she had presented to me. Hers was certainly the most unusual case I had ever worked on, and one of the most difficult insofar as her subconscious had created the symptoms as a self-criticism and was maintaining them as a punishment due to a burden of guilt - true guilt, where the intention to harm had been acted upon.

Although there are standard approaches to the induction of hypnosis, and common ways of `tying up loose ends` and checking that a resolution has been reached, within the treatment itself each case is unique. As a hypnotherapist you can`t read out a standard script or follow the same path through the sessions. Nor can you bully, argue with, criticise or put pressure on the subconscious mind. In short, you can`t simply tell it to take the migraines away, or else!

What you can do is to request help and advice from the subconscious, offer rationales for it to consider, question it and negotiate with it. And each `package` of treatment featuring these techniques needs to be tailor-made.

Since Shirley had indicated to me consciously that she believed in reincarnation, indicating a certain spiritual aspect to her personality (if not overtly religious), I decided to use that during the subsequent session.

She relaxed quickly and effortlessly, and I began to talk with the subconscious part of the mind.

" Subconscious mind, are you happy to discuss with me the topic of reincarnation, and your beliefs about this?"

Yes.

" Thank you. I`m interested to know what your view is about the whole matter...For instance, subconscious, do you believe that one essential component of every individual is what can be called the soul?"

Yes.

" I see. And is it the soul-part of each individual that survives the body after physical death?"

Yes.

" And is it the same soul-part that can reincarnate into another body, a new life, some time after the death of its previous physical self?"

Yes.

" This is fascinating, subconscious...Am I right in thinking you believe that some aspect of the memory of previous lives accompanies the soul when it reincarnates in a new physical form?"

Yes.

" Right. And are these past-life memories stored in what you understand to be yourself, the subconscious?"

Yes.

" I`m assuming that some important purpose exists for carrying these memories on from life to life: am I right?"

Yes.

" OK. And so there must also be a purpose in the soul itself reincarnating through a succession of lives: is that the case?"

Yes.

" Tell me subconscious, is the purpose of the soul existing through a number of physical lives for that soul to grow and mature and evolve?"

" I see. Subconscious mind, have you heard a little story that`s usually called The Girl At The Ford?"

No.

" May I tell it to you - I assure you it`s relevant to our work here this afternoon?"

Yes.

" Thank you subconscious...The story goes that two monks were walking home from buying fruit in the market in the town, to their monastery in the hills. Shortly after they had begun their journey, they came across a young woman standing by a stream that crossed the path at a ford. The woman was also laden with fruit and vegetables, and was wondering how to cross the water without wetting her sandals and the hem of her dress. She was reluctant to take off her sandals because the stream-bed was littered with sharp stones.

" The younger monk, a noviciate, offered to carry the woman`s baskets across the ford, and duly did so. The older monk, of greater wisdom and experience, swept the woman up in his arms and walked with her to the other side of the stream, thus ensuring her sandals were not soaked or her feet cut. The woman, delighted at the help she`d received, thanked to two monks and went on her way, as did the men themselves.

" As the journey progressed, the older monk became aware that his younger friend was becoming more and more agitated. Finally, as the monastery came into view, the young monk could hold his anger no longer.

" ` How could you dare to pick up that woman and carry her across! You know we are forbidden to have anything to do with women...I thought I was bending the rules far enough when I carried her baskets!`

" The older man nodded and smiled, and rested a friendly hand on his companion`s shoulder. ` I put that girl down at the ford, but I see you`re still carrying her,` he said. ` Which one of us, then, has committed the greater crime?`

" Subconscious mind, I hope you can see a parallel here between the story and the matter that Shirley has brought to me for treatment? Do you feel that you carrying the burden of guilt we have previously referred to is rather like the young monk carrying his burden of anger further and further along the path?"

Yes.

" I would make another point...In the story, the old monk knew full-well why his younger friend was critical of him. But conscious-Shirley, until you allowed understanding to occur during our relaxations, had no idea at all why she had been suffering these debilitating migraines for so many years. Isn`t that right?"

Yes.

" Subconscious, I also want to mention again the point we agreed upon, about the soul evolving and growing through a succession of lives...Do you believe that your soul, which is also conscious-Shirley`s soul, is growing and evolving as effectively as it might, when you`re carrying a burden of guilt stemming from Shirley`s actions during a previous life?"

No.

" Can you, then, see a beneficial way of allowing the soul to grow as effectively as possible now?"

Yes.

" And does that way involve letting go of the burden of guilt which has been having such a detrimental effect on conscious-Shirley`s present life?"

Yes.

" Right. And is one consequence of what you have just said your belief that the punishment embodied in the migraine headaches no longer serves a useful purpose now in Shirley`s life?"

Yes.

" And so are you willing to dispose of those migraine headaches completely and permanently from Shirley`s life?"

Yes.

The watershed of the treatment had been reached. Normally it occurs when the conscious mind, in understanding the circumstances by which the subconscious created the pattern of behaviour that has become a problem, can make an informed choice or decision not to carry on with the behaviour, and the subconscious will almost invariably comply. In the case of a subconsciously-inflicted punishment, the choice to let go of it was as much to do with the subconscious (the active past) as with the conscious mind (the active present).

I used the rest of the session, and the next session, to verify that the subconscious was indeed happy to dispose of the migraines. I also asked if it would be prepared to answer some further questions about Shirley`s past life or lives...

The subconscious was happy to co-operate, and as things turned out, I ended up offering Shirley a number of free sessions so that we could investigate her many incarnations.

Among the things that the subconscious revealed was that Shirley`s present life was her tenth, and her second as a woman. She had first `appeared` on Earth in the Thirteenth Century, and none of her lives had been especially important globally, or exciting individually. Over the course of ten weeks or so, we worked out the dates of the lifespans, and found only one overlap, when two of her alleged previous selves existed at once.

It was fascinating stuff, especially crisis moments in the various lives, including the hours of her deaths. These were sometimes violent, sometimes the culmination of lingering illness, but frequently moving: Shirley herself was often brought to tears as she recollected the times her soul departed her body.

I also asked questions about the interim periods, when the soul was between lives. Shirley described a kind of limbo state populated by countless faces, and overseen by a hierarchy of beings that controlled the whole of existence. Reincarnating into the next body was partly determined by these beings, and partly by the soul of the individual. A negotiation process was implied.

What interested me particularly was that Shirley postulated, not one omniscient God, but a number of powerful figures that determined the direction and fate of the universe. And not all of these beings were good. There seemed to be a balance of opposing forces, held in a creative tension, tilting this way and that as the cosmos as a whole evolved.

Shirley did not enjoy these between-life questionings. She asserted very strongly that we were treading on forbidden ground; that `we were not meant to know such things.` I pointed out that if God, or the hierarchy of beings, had allowed us the ability to access the human subconscious and ask such questions, then we were only using the skills and qualities that we had been given. I`m not sure Shirley appreciated the wry tone of my comment; certainly the response from the subconscious was not one of unequivocal agreement.

However, out of respect for Shirley`s wishes, we moved back to discussing the incarnations themselves. My frustration increased over the weeks as I found it impossible to obtain any information I could check on. My studies had wisely informed me that information about previous lives obtained under hypnosis is only of value if it can be independently verified. But I wasn`t able to get anything definite.

A typical sequence might go like this:-

" Subconscious mind, please use Shirley`s voice to answer me now. You`ve indicated that the events you`re allowing Shirley to recall today come from her life as a peasant boy in France in the Eighteenth Century. Is that so?"

" Yes."

" Are you out in the countryside in this memory you`re offering Shirley?"

" No."

" Are you in a town, then?"

" Yes."

" Is it a busy town?"

" ...Very busy...It`s market day."

" Oh, I see. You`re in a street, then?"

" Yes."

" What`s the name of that street?"

" Don`t know."

" Why don`t you know?"

" ...Never been told."

" Are there people around you?"

" Yes."

" Why don`t you ask one of them what the name of the street is?"

" ...They`ll think I`m begging...Chase me away..."

" Can you hear people talking around you?"

" Yes."

" Tell me some of the things they`re saying."

" ...Can`t..."

" Why can`t you?"

"...People speaking too quickly...Too many voices..."

" I see. So what is the name of the town you`re in?"

" Don`t know."

" Why don`t you know?"

"...Never bothered to ask...Don`t care much anyway..."

It was this signal lack of progress that caused me to terminate the sessions in the end. Their main value had been to monitor Shirley over the course of a few months: her migraines had not returned.

*

So, had she lived before, as she claimed? And could the problem she`d experienced in this present life really have stemmed from her actions as a man living nearly two centuries ago?

I was prepared to give her the benefit of the doubt, and keep my cynicism in check...But only a couple of weeks ago, as I was putting the finishing touches to this book, Shirley rang me back after a period of two years.

Her migraine headaches had returned.

*

Chapter 9: A Fear Of Knowing.

It`s great, of course, when cases go smoothly (as Lilian`s did for the rest of her treatment, after we`d dealt with her asthma. I`ll discuss this in the next chapter). But sometimes they don`t, and I was reminded of Lilian when Vicky came to consult me over a problem of insomnia.

" I`ve had it for years," Vicky explained, " and in a sense I`ve got used to it now. It allows me lots of time to think about things and make plans. The trouble is, I love my work - I really love my work - but I`m finding now that I can`t cope, because of tiredness." She smiled faintly. " I even turned down a directorship of the company because I didn`t think I`d be able to manage - purely due to the insomnia. I`ve reached the state where I just bump into things, like I`m half asleep on my feet. Do you think you can help me?"

Vicky seemed like a highly educated, very controlled and determined woman. Yet there was a certain sadness about her, and a cynicism present in her voice, which I thought had more to do with self-reflection than with her attitude to hypnotherapy.

I gave my usual explanations of how treatment would proceed, and explained that if the subconscious part of the mind agreed to co-operate, then we stood a good chance of resolving the difficulty.

During my five years of practice, I had not dealt with that many cases of insomnia. But the ones I had experienced led me to believe that the subconscious creates this pattern of behaviour only as an extreme measure, based on what it perceives to be very serious circumstances - often circumstances that pose a threat to the safety of the individual. Everyone knows that sleep is essential for both mental and physical health. During the hours of wakefulness, the subconscious needs to work very hard to accommodate the wishes, decisions and actions of the conscious part of the mind - co-ordinating the body to allow us to live our conscious lives. It also has a vast flood of incoming information to deal with; all the sights, sounds, smells, etc, that pour in through the senses moment by moment.

Sleep, when the body is still and the conscious mind is `switched off`, allows the subconscious to catch up on its paperwork, as it were; creating time when the events of the day can be incorporated into its map of reality, the regular updating of which is vital for our survival. Thus, when the subconscious mind deliberately deprives itself of this vital time, then it can only be because desperate measures are required to meet a desperate situation.

Vicky seemed satisfied by my `lecture` on hypnosis, and agreed to the initial session.

When she came for that session, I used my usual induction technique and method of establishing contact with the subconscious mind - going through the visualisation of helium-filled balloons being tied to the index fingers; the balloon fixed to the right index finger moving for Yes, the left for No.

I then explained the ethos of the treatment; that we were not here to judge or criticise anything the subconscious might have done in Vicky`s life...

" It has been my experience, subconscious mind, in dealing with hundreds of clients, that the subconscious creates things for very good reasons, based on what it considers to be sound beliefs. And so we never criticise. Rather, our aim is to understand the circumstances that have led you to create and maintain the patterns of behaviour that conscious-Vicky has brought to my attention, and which are causing some difficulty in her life - because it is our overriding belief that when both parts of the mind are working together and in harmony, then the individual as a whole can live most happily, healthily and effectively.

" Based on what I have said, subconscious - and since your help, advice and guidance will be invaluable to us - are you prepared to co-operate in allowing us to understand more about what we are calling the insomnia in Vicky`s life?"

To my dismay, there was not a flicker from either index finger. And yet Vicky`s facial muscles were relaxed, her breathing slow and steady, indicating that hypnosis had occurred.

I extended the helium-balloon visualisation by using a gas cylinder and hose to pump more helium into the balloons through little valves which I asked Vicky to notice just then.

" You can see those balloons becoming larger as the helium goes in - you may even hear the hiss of the gas as it passes at some pressure through the valve. Certainly you`ll be able to feel how much more firmly those balloons are tugging at the strings attached to your index fingers - with the result that those fingers become even more sensitive to the slightest movement of the balloons...And remain aware of the fact that as long as those balloons are attached to the index fingers, they take away all the weight from the fingers, and all responsibility of weight..."

I went through the rigmarole of asking for co-operation again, and then to my dismay and surprise, Vicky burst into tears.

" I`m fighting it! I can`t help it - I`m fighting it!"

" Conscious-Vicky, this is something over which you have complete control, because it`s happening at a conscious level. You can decide not to fight it: just let those balloons do the work. Don`t be concerned about them..."

" I don`t know if I can do it!"

" Conscious-Vicky, do you believe that while this conflict, in the form of insomnia, exists in your life, you are not living as happily and effectively as you wish to?"

" Yes."

" OK. And do you give permission for your subconscious mind to allow us to understand the origins of that insomnia?"

" What if it doesn`t want to?"

" That`s not your problem," I said firmly, but trying to keep the irritation out of my voice. " That`s what I`m here for, the pave the way for easy, painless, and effective communication. So, do you give permission for your subconscious mind to allow us to understand the origins of that insomnia?"

" Yes."

" And do you give your permission for the subconscious to use those helium balloons as I`ve instructed?"

" Yes."

" Fine, then just stand back from it, Vicky: let it happen. Either become a passive observer of the information the subconscious will offer up to us, or involve yourself in imagining a place that`s safe, comfortable and pleasant - I`ve explained how you can do that, remember?"

" Yes."

" OK, just let me talk to the subconscious mind now...Subconscious, are you prepared to co-operate in allowing us to understand more about what we are calling the insomnia in Vicky`s life?"

The Yes finger flickered madly, and as it did so Vicky gave a little groan and her face crumpled, and she began crying quietly again.

" This is awful...I feel devastated..."

" Do you want to end this relaxation, Vicky?"

" No, I need to get rid of the insomnia."

" All right, I`ll continue..."

We quickly established that the insomnia had been created for a purpose - in fact, as a protection in Vicky`s life, not just for herself, but for at least one other person. And while the subconscious agreed that the insomnia represented a conflict between the two parts of the mind, and that such conflict diminished the effectiveness of the individual, it was insistent that the insomnia served a useful and beneficial purpose.

" Subconscious, I want to thank you for the readiness and effectiveness of your co-operation...But if you understand the ethos and structure of the hypnotherapy, as I know you do, then you`ll realise that we need to know more from you...Will you let us know more?"

Both index fingers jolted, trembling with a conflict of their own.

" All right, I don`t wish to put any pressure on you, and I will of course respect your wishes at all times...Are you willing to let conscious-Vicky understand more about the circumstances that led you to create and maintain the insomnia in her life?"

Yes.

" Will you let me know more about - "

No - No - No!

" Fine, subconscious mind: it`s Vicky understanding that`s important..."

Over the past minute, Vicky`s soft sobbing had continued, but now increased as she became very distressed indeed.

" I`m so embarrassed!" she wailed. " And I`m boiling hot...I`ve never felt so miserable..."

" Vicky, do you want this understanding to come forward?"

" Yes. Yes, I do!"

I proceeded to negotiate with the subconscious to minimise any unpleasant emotions that conscious-Vicky might be required to experience in order to have the clear understanding we`d requested. Then I instructed the subconscious to `deliver the goods.`

After a couple of minutes, I asked Vicky if she now knew more about her insomnia. She shook her head miserably.

Since our session was in any case drawing to a close, I brought her out of hypnosis. As she awoke, the distress seemed to leave her. She smiled tearfully and reached for her bag for a tissue.

" Oh, I didn`t like that at all! I was conscious of a terrible turmoil inside, a fighting in my body. That`s what made me cry..."

I explained that emotions, as much as thoughts, are messages from the subconscious mind; and my suspicion was that the uncontrolled crying was a memory-echo, perhaps part of a re-enactment of some long-forgotten incident.

" Well," I said, " I`m sorry you had such an unpleasant time. I don`t like it either when a client suffers during treatment. It isn`t customer-friendly," I grinned.

Despite her ordeal, Vicky was quite prepared to come back in a week and continue her treatment. She shrugged as I showed her to the door.

" Mind you, I don`t think I`m very good at following your instructions..."

" Really? I thought you were responding very well in the end."

" Well, I saw the balloons you kept going on about - they were silver and green, metallic ones: but I couldn`t imagine a place that was safe and pleasant. And I kept getting distracted by the traffic. All the time I was aware of the unending traffic noise outside."

I nodded without making any comment - because Vicky`s appointment had been an evening one, and apart from the occasional car passing the house, the street had been quiet for the past hour.

*

" The only response I had to my session was a huge blister that came up on my side," Vicky said, quite matter-of-factly I thought, considering she seemed to regard the blister as the result of the previous session. " I had one once before, though on my arm..."

" So you received no insight with regard to your insomnia?"

" Nothing. I can`t bring myself to think about anything that happened during the last session. All I can remember, after you asked me to imagine a safe comfortable place, is that I was standing on a landing - "

" Was it a landing you recognised?"

" I don`t know. I can`t remember now...And I kept getting distracted by traffic noise: all the while, car after car swishing by."

" The street outside wasn`t very busy when I saw you last, Vicky. Could you have been imagining the traffic noises you heard?"

She shrugged. " I don`t know. Why would I want to distract myself by imagining traffic noises?"

It was the kind of question I relished, of course, and one that we might well be able to answer once Vicky had entered hypnosis. The general answer, I felt, was that since the traffic noises had to be imagined, the subconscious mind was deliberately creating them for a purpose: the noises were significant somehow, and the significance was to do with Vicky`s insomnia problem.

" Well," I said cheerfully, " I hope the noises don`t trouble you this time. Are you happy to start the relaxation now?" I wondered.

She gave me a small, rather pained smile.

" I won`t say I`m happy about it. But I`ve got to see this through now I`ve started, haven`t I?"

" Vicky, you know you can terminate your treatment whenever you like. I`ve never been the sort to insist that clients keep coming back unless they feel optimistic that we`re going to get a result...Having said that, I think your determination - your doggedness even - to resolve the problem is admirable; and it acts as a powerful signal to the subconscious to prepare to co-operate with us!"

" Or it gives the subconscious time to prepare its defences against the invasion..."

I grinned. " We`re not at war with the subconscious. It is not the enemy. It may be very reluctant to co-operate on certain matters, but if so then it`s for a reason. And we can negotiate to uncover that reason."

" OK, if you say so. Let`s get on with it."

This time, I used my quick induction technique and just told conscious-Vicky to step aside from things; to be a passive observer of all that the subconscious was attempting to tell us.

I touched the index fingers, asked that they be used as the Yes/No responses, and began my questioning.

" Subconscious, hello again. There are various matters that I`d like your help with tonight, and of course I`ll mention each item before asking for your co-operation.... Subconscious, the first item intrigues me. It concerns conscious-Vicky`s impression during the last relaxation that the traffic noise was constant. Would you allow us to understand more about this impression?"

Yes.

" Thank you. Did you create that impression of constant traffic within Vicky`s own imagination?"

Yes.

" I see, that`s fascinating. Subconscious mind, conscious-Vicky also reported to me that she was only able to visualise a landing when I asked her to imagine a safe, comfortable and pleasant place...Were you controlling that visualisation also, subconscious?"

Yes.

" Right. And were the traffic noises and landing part of the same imaginary scene?"

Yes.

" So is it right that you were deliberately projecting the vivid impressions of constant traffic noises and the landing into conscious-Vicky`s awareness?"

Yes.

" Were you attempting to create a safe, comfortable and pleasant place for Vicky?"

Yes.

" Thank you, subconscious. I appreciate your kindness in doing that...Does conscious-Vicky know why those impressions are safe and pleasant for her?"

No.

" OK, If I may I`ll come back to that a little later. Subconscious, another matter I`d like to discuss with you is the blister that has appeared on Vicky`s side. Are you prepared to co-operate in allowing - "

No! No! No!

" Well that`s clear enough, subconscious, and I respect your wishes of course. But tell me, did you deliberately create that blister for a purpose?"

Yes.

" But you`re not prepared to tell me what the purpose is: is that right?"

Yes.

" All right, subconscious, that`s fine. Would you, then, be prepared to allow the conscious mind to understand the importance of the traffic noise and landing impressions you created: it`s obviously important to you..."

Yes.

" Good. Will you permit Vicky to tell me what you are prepared to allow her to understand?"

Yes.

" Go ahead, then, with my thanks..."

I sat back and allowed the inner work to be done. A couple of minutes later an expression of frustration and pain came over Vicky`s face. She shook her head.

" It`s no good...I`m getting nothing...I`m just afraid...I`m afraid..."

" I`m talking to the subconscious part of the mind now. Subconscious, is that feeling of being afraid coming from you? - Use the fingers to answer me."

Yes.

" Is some part of you afraid?"

Yes! Yes!

" OK, do you realise you have a very useful and powerful ally ready to help you right now?"

No.

" Well you have - and that ally is Vicky`s adult, mature, intelligent conscious mind. Subconscious, conscious-Vicky has had great experience in dealing with the trials and tribulations of life. She wants you to rely on her conscious qualities as much as she wants your help and advice...Subconscious, this is what I mean by co-operation between the two parts of the mind allowing the whole individual to be stronger, happier, healthier. Do you accept these ideas, subconscious?"

Yes.

" In that case, even though part of you is afraid, allow yourself to talk with conscious-Vicky. Show her now why the traffic noise and the landing is pleasant and safe. Give her some guidance, so that we can work towards her guiding you, to get rid of your fear..."

Yes.

" Go ahead with your work..."

Another minute passed, and Vicky`s face tightened with the intensity of her concentration.

" I can see my Nan...My Nan is standing there on the landing...She`s wearing an apron...I hear cars going by outside - constantly - always cars...But I can`t hear what my Nan is saying..."

" Subconscious mind, do you intend conscious-Vicky to hear what your Nan is saying?"

Yes.

" Do whatever`s necessary to allow Nan`s advice to be heard....And conscious-Vicky, do you understand why the subconscious chose to represent itself as your Nan?"

" No, not yet...I can hear her now..."

" OK, just listen without analysing or judging what`s being said...And tell me just as much as you need to or want to, to allow me to help you further."

" Yes...She`s warning me..."

" About what?"

" I don`t know...But my Nan is the voice of my conscience...Now I know! Now I know! I`m being punished!"

" Do you know why you`re being punished?"

At this, Vicky burst into tears again, and nodded miserably.

" Yes, I think I do...Yes..."

" Do you understand the link between the punishment and the part of the mind that`s afraid?"

" Yes - But I`ve always known - I don`t need this!"

" Do you understand the link between the punishment and the part of the mind that`s afraid, and the insomnia problem?"

" I can`t accept it?"

" But do you understand it?"

" I`m not really getting it...But I`ve always known about this. And I can`t accept it..."

" OK, just relax now. Subconscious, I see we`re having some difficulties here, and since our relaxation time is coming to an end, I`d like to thank you for all you`ve felt able to do for us today..."

I brought Vicky out of hypnosis moments afterwards. She looked cross.

" I think I`m on the road to nowhere with this hypnosis...Or else I`m going off my head!"

" Why do you say that?"

" Well, I just can`t accept in my mind the way I`m living. There`s so much conflict. I mean, how can I possibly hope to solve my problem?"

" You`ve asked me a general question, so I`ll give you a general answer: you solve a problem by changing yourself, or your circumstances, or both."

This seemed to make Vicky even crosser.

" Well that`s easy for you to say!"

" It`s frustrating for me to say it - because I can`t advise you any more precisely, since you haven`t told me about the understandings you`ve had in hypnosis."

" Do I have to tell you?"

" No," I said. " I`ve already explained that. But the more precise the information is that you give me, the more precise my subsequent questions to the subconscious mind can be. I will also emphasise once more that our work here is completely confidential."

" You`ve told me about other cases you`ve cured - "

" Yes, but those people are completely anonymous to you. I said that a lady came to me with migraines - but you don`t know her from Adam, or rather Eve. Nobody will ever link any information you give me with you."

Vicky drew in a deep breath, then let it out in a huge sigh.

" All right. Briefly, I`ve got a problem with my husband. I have difficulty living with him, but I can`t afford to walk out."

" I see - "

" No, there`s more. I go out with my boss occasionally..."

" You mean, you`re having a relationship?"

Vicky nodded. That`s the bit I can`t accept - I mean, the way I`m conducting myself. But it`s the only thing that`s kept me going...And you know, I don`t feel guilty about seeing my boss. But it`s not going to be a long-lasting thing. On the other hand, while I can`t leave my husband, I`m not happy the way I am...So you see, it`s mayhem. And now my conscience comes along to give me a lecture...I`m judge, jury and hangman for myself!"

" I see why you`re upset," I told her. " And so you think you`re being punished through insomnia because you don`t feel guilty about your current situation?"

She shrugged. " What else could it be?"

" What I`m asking is whether you`ve gained a clear insight about the insomnia being a punishment?"

" I don`t know...Anyway, what`s the link between my subconscious mind and my conscience? I thought the subconscious wasn`t as, well, intelligent as my conscious mind..."

" I think that `conscience` is our sense of right and wrong, founded upon beliefs, which have their origins in our life experience. Therefore, our conscience has both a subconscious and a conscious component. Our morality is woven into our subconscious map of reality. That informs us about what`s right or not, and we then consciously decide about our actions, based on what we think and feel."

" So my subconscious could well be punishing me for seeing my boss?"

" Yes, it could. But I`m not going to prejudge what the subconscious is going to tell us, that isn`t my job. In fact, my view is that if any hypnotherapist or psychotherapist presumes to tell you what`s caused your problem, he or she is doing you a gross disservice. Similarly, your own conscious speculations, based on fragmentary knowledge, are quite pointless. The story isn`t over `till it`s over. Since you aren`t sure about the links between insomnia and punishment, we can`t come to any decisions about it. And then there`s the part of mind that`s afraid: what`s that got to do with the insomnia problem? Why is that part afraid?"

" I don`t know," Vicky said rather snappishly. " I`m not sure of anything now."

" That`s because the treatment hasn`t reached it`s conclusion yet...Do you want it to?" I wondered, not expecting her to say yes.

But she nodded determinedly. " Oh, if there`s one thing I`ve always believed about myself, it`s that I know my own mind. Well, hypnotherapy has shown me there`s a part of my mind I don`t know yet - But I`m bloody well going to! If you have a slot free, I`ll see you at the same time next week."

*

" The blister has gone away, and it`s been replaced by a patch of dry skin."

" OK. I can ask about that. Has anything else that you feel is relevant to the treatment emerged in the past week?"

" Well, not really...But there`s something I haven`t told you about - it`s another problem I`ve got. But I didn`t think it had anything to do with the insomnia. Except it`s great at preventing me from going to sleep!"

" So, what is this other problem?"

" Tinnitus," Vicky said. " I`ve had it for nearly three years now. It just came one day. My doctor told me there wasn`t much we could do about it."

" I guess he was looking for the answer in your ear," I told her. " It`s a bit like a garage mechanic looking at a headlamp to find out why it keeps breaking, when in fact the driver persists in bumping the car into a wall. I`ll ask the subconscious mind about the tinnitus too. The point is, if you tell me about all of the things that you regard as problems, then we can establish whether links exist between them, as far as the subconscious mind is concerned. If they do, then in dealing with one problem, we also deal with the other linked ones: that`s good news for you, because it saves you time and money. If, say, the tinnitus is not linked, then when we`ve dealt with the insomnia, we can track down the origin of the tinnitus..."

" You sound pretty confident about it," Vicky pointed out, with a small smile that was just touched a little by scepticism.

" I`m confident about the power of hypnotherapy, and my ability to apply the techniques professionally. Having said that, I could never offer a guarantee that using these methods we`ll find a cure for you: but then, I don`t suppose your doctor could offer a guaranteed cure for the insomnia or tinnitus either."

" That`s fair enough, Steve. Shall we start now?"

" Just one other thing. Do you have an idea about why your Nan came to mind during last week`s session? Why her in particular?"

" My Mum went off with another man when I was about five. I lived with my grandparents for a time: Nan was like a mother to me. I suppose that`s why."

" Fine, thanks. All right, let`s begin the relaxation...You`re getting to be an expert at it now, so all I want you to do is settle back in the couch and begin to become aware of your breathing..."

Shortly afterwards, I began talking to Vicky`s subconscious mind.

" Subconscious mind, I am very concerned about the part of you that is afraid. I know how terrible it can be to feel frightened, or vulnerable, or threatened. Before we go any further today, I just want to emphasise once more that I`m here to help you as far as I can, subconscious. And the nature of that help is to allow you to avail yourself of the strengths, abilities and qualities of the adult, mature, intelligent conscious part of the mind.

" Subconscious, neither I nor conscious-Vicky want to take anything from you that you are not completely prepared to give up. But I must point out that because conscious-Vicky is an integral and essential part - as you are - of the whole individual, she has a right to know why you have created the things which are troubling her currently in her life - I`m talking about what we are calling insomnia, tinnitus, and the patch of dry skin that had been a blister.

" But before I begin to broach these matters with you, I wonder, subconscious, if you`d let me talk to the part of you that is afraid?"

For a few moments, nothing happened, and then Vicky`s Yes finger quivered ever so slightly, then lifted rather tentatively.

" Thank you, I`m grateful for this help. Come forward then, subconscious part-that-is-afraid, and use those index fingers to communicate with me...Subconscious part, do you accept my reassurances that I`m here to help you?"

Yes.

" That`s good. And do you accept the idea that you may be able to get a great deal of useful help and advice from conscious-Vicky?"

Yes.

" Fine. Now, subconscious part, the thing that`s causing Vicky the most difficulty in her life at the moment is the pattern of behaviour we`re calling insomnia. Based on your acceptance of the reassurances and ideas I`ve offered you, are you prepared to let us know more about what led you to create and then maintain the insomnia in Vicky`s life?"

Yes.

" Good. Subconscious-part, Vicky has the impression that the insomnia was created as a punishment for her, because of the relationship she`s having with her boss. Is this impression accurate?"

No.

" Oh, I see. But the insomnia has been created for a purpose by the subconscious, is that right?"

Yes.

" Conscious-Vicky has also told me about her Mum `going off with another man` when Vicky was about five years old. Is this incident connected to the creation and maintenance of the insomnia?"

Yes.

" Is the incident I`ve just referred to the one that first set you on the path to the creation of the insomnia?"

No.

" Subconscious-part, are you prepared to discuss the matter of the tinnitus in conscious-Vicky`s life with me?"

Yes.

" OK, fine. Subconscious-part, was the tinnitus created for a purpose?"

No.

This surprised me, since relatively few problems brought to hypnotherapists are purely physiological; that is, without the intervention of the mind. I also recalled that Vicky had said the tinnitus worked wonderfully in keeping her awake - that is, as a useful adjunct to the insomnia.

In hypnotherapy, the precise phrasing of a question to the subconscious can make all the difference to the response. And I was aware that I was talking to a frightened and vulnerable part of Vicky`s mind - probably a part that represented the way she felt when she was about five years old. I put the question to her in another way.

" Did the actions of the subconscious mind lead to the creation of the tinnitus in Vicky`s life?"

Yes.

" OK, right. Are the insomnia and tinnitus linked, then, as far as the subconscious is concerned?"

Yes.

" Subconscious-part-that-is afraid, are you prepared to allow conscious-Vicky to know why you are afraid?"

No! No!

" But subconscious-part, you don`t enjoy being afraid, do you?"

No.

" Would you feel pleased if a way could be suggested of ending the fear for you?"

Yes.

" Well that`s fine...But, subconscious-part, in order to end the your fear, conscious-Vicky and I need to know why you became afraid. That sounds reasonable, doesn`t it?"

Yes.

" As I`ve said, we`re here to help. But to let us help, you must let us understand. And so, are you now prepared to allow conscious-Vicky to know why you became afraid?"

Yes.

" Right, and once Vicky knows, will you permit her to tell me?"

Yes.

Having negotiated the release of the information, and a minimising of the unpleasant emotions the subconscious indicated were part of the understanding, I asked for the communication to occur.

After less than a minute, Vicky gave a choking sob and said, " My mother left me! But it was so long ago!"

" Vicky, this is something you`ve always known. Have you gained any new insights into the matter?"

She shook her head vigorously.

" No - No, I can`t!"

" I want to talk to the subconscious-part-that-is-afraid...Subconscious part, is there a part of the subconscious that objects to co-operating in the way I`ve been talking about?"

No.

" Is there a part of the mind that objects to co-operating in the way I`ve been talking about?"

Yes.

" Is the part-that-objects within the conscious realm?"

Yes.

" Vicky, do you understand that it`s you - the conscious-you in the here-and-now, that`s preventing understanding from occurring?"

Vicky shook her head her head from side to side; not to disagree with me, I felt, but in denial of the information that the helpful subconscious wanted to pass on to her. She looked so thoroughly miserable that I couldn`t help feeling sorry for her - although I was fully aware of the fact that, as far as hypnotherapy was concerned, tea and sympathy was not one of the techniques that got results!

" All right, I want to talk once more to the subconscious mind in its entirety. And I`d like to thank you, subconscious-part-that-is-afraid, for all your efforts and help this evening...Am I now talking to the subconscious as a whole: use the fingers to answer."

Yes.

" Subconscious, if we were able to progress in our work together to the point where we could resolve the conflict of the insomnia, would we, as a consequence, also resolve the conflict of the tinnitus?"

Yes.

" Subconscious, I realise that you`ve created the insomnia for a reason. But would you agree that some good nights` sleep would be of great benefit to you in the work you do to keep Vicky alive and healthy?"

Yes.

" Right, well since you`ve agreed, I wonder if I might suggest what I hope is a workable compromise between yourself and the conscious part of the mind over the next week...Subconscious, I`m going to ask you to allow Vicky to have some nights of good, solid, nourishing sleep over the next week. In other words, I want you to turn down the insomnia symptoms until they`re negligible - But with the proviso that if you feel the need to bring those symptoms back, then you can do so, but only to the extent to which they are needed. This will help both parts of the mind to become refreshed, stronger, healthier. Do you agree, subconscious?"

Yes.

" And in the light of that agreement, will you now do all that`s necessary to implement the compromise I`ve been talking about?"

Yes.

I sighed with relief, because obviously one big sticking-point in the whole case was the reluctance of Vicky`s conscious mind to recall what had happened in her life that led to the creation of the insomnia. At least if the compromise worked, Vicky`s faith in hypnotherapy would be boosted, and she`d also feel reassured that her subconscious was not `out to get her`, but in fact was as eager as she was to resolve the insomnia and related problems.

My thinking at this point was that Vicky`s impression that the insomnia was a punishment for her infidelity was quite wrong. She`d told me she didn`t feel guilty, and yet she seemed to have leaped at the idea that she was being punished - as though, on a conscious level, she thought she ought to be.

But as I had said to her earlier, it wasn`t my job to interpret subconscious material for her. The significance of the impressions she received was entirely unique to her own life and perceptions. On the other hand, I wasn`t going to be content with the first `insight` she, or any client, came up with. No hypnotherapist should be so naive as to accept that simply by asking, you`ll be told the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth...Because while the subconscious, I`ve found, is not devious or deceitful, the conscious mind can be. And both parts of the mind can be frightened, as appeared to be the case here.

*

" It was really strange last time - in the last session," was the first thing Vicky said when she turned up for her next appointment. " When I was in hypnosis, my mind was flashing images in front of me...I remembered that years ago my husband used to work shifts, and I hated the nights: I never came to terms with it. I also listen for little noises at night..."

" You still do that?"

Vicky nodded. " Yes, even though my husband doesn`t do shift work now. I suppose the habit developed years ago, when I slept alone..."

" When people use the word `habit`," I said, " they tend to mean a behaviour that serves no purpose now; something they`d like to be rid of - "

" I certainly would like to be rid of it!"

" Of course you would. But things are more complicated, I`ve found..."

I saw Vicky roll her eyes upwards, as if to say, `just my luck`, and I smiled.

" Habits are established sometimes when the conscious mind repeatedly carries out an action: each repetition serves as an instruction to the subconscious to say `I like doing this.` Eventually - because this is the job of the subconscious - it puts the behaviour on automatic, as it were, so that consciously we don`t need to think about it any more. Often it comes in handy, like driving. Luckily, most drivers don`t need consciously to think about their every action when they`re driving. In fact, the body `gets on with it` while our thoughts are elsewhere, quite often. But other habits can become a nuisance, like smoking. The subconscious maintains the behaviour, and because in most cases people try to fight the habit through will-power, a conflict is set up, a battle between smoke and not-smoke."

" So you think my insomnia is like that, a kind of programming?"

" Well, no, I don`t actually. As I`ve already explained, behaviours occur for reasons. The conscious mind frequently has a reason for initiating a behaviour, which if it`s repeated, is put onto automatic by the subconscious. But as we`ve seen, the subconscious can also create behaviours for a purpose. Now in your case, the subconscious has indicated it did create the insomnia for a purpose - and it may be that lying awake at nights listening for tiny sounds is part of that subconsciously-purposeful behaviour: or it could be a separate behaviour, again created by the subconscious..."

Vicky`s chuckle sounded exasperated.

" This is all a bit technical! I`ve seen on the news that in America people are buying a new drug on the market - Melatonin. It`s supposed to cure insomnia - and it`s also claimed to slow down ageing, and prolong sexual vitality..."

" That couldn`t be a marketing ploy of course," I muttered.

" In Britain you can only get Melatonin on prescription - but do you think it`s worth me seeing my doctor about it?"

" Is this the same doctor who looked in your ear for the cause of the tinnitus?" I wondered. " To be honest, since I`m not medically qualified, I can`t advise you to see your doctor or not. I saw the feature about Melatonin too. I looked it up and found that melatonin is a hormone produced by the pineal gland during the hours of darkness. According to my encyclopaedia of anatomy and physiology, `melatonin may inhibit reproductive activities by inhibiting gonadotrophic hormones` - which are hormones regulating the functions of the ovaries and testicles.

" I don`t know what connection melatonin has with sleep itself, therefore. But look, even if we suppose that there is a connection, and your pineal gland is not producing the right amounts of melatonin - what`s controlling the pineal gland?"

Vicky shrugged. " Um, my brain?"

" Yes. The brain is the `machinery` that expresses the activities of the mind. I`d prefer to say that your mind controls your pineal gland. But do you consciously control it: do you say to yourself, `pineal gland, squirt out some extra melatonin now, please...`."

" No, of course not."

" So it`s the subconscious mind which controls the pineal gland, as it controls every other aspect of the body. This is the fundamental principle of hypnotherapy, Vicky! Now I know that in our culture, most doctors and conservative-thinking psychologists would scoff at the idea. What`s the point of fiddling about with melatonin, or the gland that produces melatonin, when we need to access - not the control centre of the brain - but the intelligence behind the control centre, the subconscious mind itself!"

I realised that I`d jumped on to a hobby-horse, and was taking up valuable session time. However, I had no client after Vicky, and so decided to extend the session past the hour.

" From the way you talk, it sounds like hypnotherapists and doctors will never agree on how to cure people, then..."

" Surgery and drugs are often essential to save life, or enhance the quality of life," I said more quietly. " Some doctors are open-minded enough to realise that physical ills don`t always have their origins in the body. At the far end of the spectrum is doctor Raymond Abrezol who asserts that `all disease is memory` - that every disorder is the result of information actively applied within and by the subconscious mind. Of course," I went on, " some conservative hypnotherapists use the art just to eradicate smoking, or to do `suggestion therapy` on supposedly purely mental/emotional problems, like phobias or `stress`. Even they don`t have the confidence to tackle overtly physical ailments. But hypnotherapy can do that, if used properly under the right circumstances."

" But it could be dangerous, couldn`t it," Vicky said, " if someone is under a doctor`s care for a problem, and taking drugs for it, and you tell them they`re cured and don`t need to take the drugs any longer - "

I held up my hand to forestall her.

" No, I never do that. I never suggest that any client should abandon conventional medical treatment when they come for hypnotherapy. In fact, if the point comes up, I encourage clients to tell their doctor they`re having hypnotherapy treatment. In most cases the doctors don`t mind, because they think hypnotherapy is harmless quackery."

" So why do you bother to say anything about it?"

" Because when the client is cured, she can tell the doctor and give him some food for thought!"

" So you think you can cure my insomnia?"

" I think we can learn more about it - perhaps enough to allow you to reach the point of understanding whereby you can instruct the subconscious that the insomnia is no longer appropriate in your life."

" I know that already - "

" No you don`t, because you don`t know why it was created. It`s like a house builder deciding to knock down a wall, assuming the wall serves no useful purpose. But it could be a load-bearing wall, one that holds the whole structure together."

" You think the insomnia is holding me together?"

" Maybe it is," I agreed. " Or maybe it did once; and the behaviour has been set on automatic, even though your life circumstances have entirely changed. Like I said, we don`t know yet."

" But if the insomnia - "

" Vicky," I interrupted. " All we`re doing is speculating consciously, which is no good at all. Let`s get on and ask the part of the mind that knows."

" OK," she said, a little sheepishly, and settled back on the couch.

" But just before we begin the relaxation, tell me whether you got better sleep this past week."

" Oh, well I did for the first night; it was wonderful. But then as the nights went by I just settled back into my old pattern."

" In other words, the insomnia symptoms returned?"

" Yes. But oddly, that first night, even though I slept well, as I drifted off I had such strange feelings...This is going to sound stupid! Feelings of sadness and self-pity, as though I`d spent my life giving love to other people, but not getting any back for myself...And in the days since, I`ve felt really moody and peevish, as though I`m looking around for someone to punish..."

She chuckled, as though this was all silly nonsense, and closed her eyes in anticipation of the hypnosis.

But to me she`d said something very significant indeed, which cast the whole notion of punishment in Vicky`s case in a much clearer light.

*

" Subconscious mind, you`re aware of my conversations with conscious-Vicky...Is it the case that she has not slept soundly every night for the past week because you felt the need to bring the insomnia symptoms back?"

Yes.

" Right. And the phenomenon that Vicky has reported to me, of listening for tiny sounds in the night; is this phenomenon a part of the pattern of behaviour that we are calling insomnia?"

Yes.

" I see. And subconscious, these feelings that Vicky has experienced - feelings of self-pity, of giving but not receiving love - are they linked as far as you`re concerned to the incidents which led you to create and maintain the insomnia in Vicky`s life?"

Yes.

" I just want to verify something with you, subconscious - and forgive me if we feel we`re covering old ground...Have you created the insomnia in Vicky`s life as a punishment?"

No.

" Have you created the tinnitus in Vicky`s life as a punishment?"

No.

" Will you allow the conscious mind to know why you created these things in Vicky`s life?"

Yes.

I ran through the usual process of negotiation regarding unpleasant emotions, then asked for understanding to occur, and for the Yes finger to lift when the work was done.

After a couple of minutes, nothing had happened, so I asked if the process of communicating the understanding necessarily took longer than a few minutes...

No.

" Then is there a difficulty in allowing this understanding to occur?"

Yes.

" Does the difficulty lie in the subconscious part of the mind?"

No.

" The difficulty lies in the conscious mind, then?"

Yes.

" Does conscious-Vicky understand the nature of the difficulty that she herself is experiencing?"

No.

" Subconscious, we need your help now. Are you prepared to make Vicky aware of why she`s having difficulty receiving the understandings that you have agreed to offer up?"

Yes.

" Go ahead right now...And conscious-Vicky, as ideas come to you, just let me know about them; that will be very useful..."

As the inner work began, I found myself thinking what a strange and wonderful thing the human mind is. Here we had a case where the subconscious, including the frightened and vulnerable part that evidently centred on early traumatic experiences in Vicky`s life, had accepted our reasonings and was prepared to co-operate: and yet the intelligent adult conscious mind was holding back. It too was frightened - frightened of knowing what the subconscious had had to live with all these years.

Within a minute, Vicky`s face had assumed the now-familiar expression of intense sadness, and she began to cry softly. The subconscious was obviously passing information through: I just hoped it was something more precise than vague feelings of misery, sadness, self-pity...

" I`m addressing conscious-Vicky. Vicky, are you getting insights now?"

" It doesn`t make sense...There`s just a picture..."

" Tell me about the picture."

" ...My stepmother, she wouldn`t let me go to grammar school...I really wanted to go...She didn`t like me...All of it was horrible, when I was little...I try not to think about it..."

" You try not to think about the times when you were little?"

" Yes."

And there, I realised, was the nature of the block. Vicky was deliberately resisting the memories which would unlock the secret of why her insomnia existed. I pointed that out to her, and her sobbing increased - but changed, coming now from the conscious realisation that to resolve her problem, she had to know!

Some hypnotherapists and psychotherapists insist that their clients must relive traumatic experiences in order to be rid of a problem. This process is called abreaction. I don`t subscribe to it myself, because understanding how incidents were put together to create a problem does not necessarily involve replaying the incidents themselves in the imagination. Indeed, the `replay` might not of itself reveal the incidents` significance! Very inept therapists insist on clients reliving `the most traumatic incident in your life` as a matter of course, without even knowing sometimes if that incident has any bearing at all on the problem presented.

This seems barbaric to me. In Vicky`s case, because she felt with regard to her childhood that `it had all been horrible`, it seemed inevitable that some unpleasant emotions would accompany the understanding. But the subconscious, due to our negotiations, would minimise those unpleasant emotions. And in any case, once the significance was there in the conscious mind, the problem could be disposed of, together with all of its symptoms.

" Vicky, as I`ve said from the start, you are the one who should be in control of your own life. Remember, knowledge plus awareness equals control. Whatever has happened to you in the past, you have survived it. Your insomnia was created by the subconscious to deal with situations based on incidents that happened a long time ago. By understanding those incidents, you can decide if the insomnia is still useful to you. If you choose not to know, then the insomnia and tinnitus will stay with you - "

" Just tell it to go away!"

" You know I can`t do that. The insomnia was created for a reason. We can only control the insomnia when we know that reason...Now Vicky, your subconscious mind is working hard to do its best for the health of the whole individual. Are you prepared to do the same?"

"...Yes..."

" All right. Now all you have to do is to tell the subconscious it`s OK for it to send you those memories. Then step back from it and let them come. You won`t relive those memories as a little girl; you`ll simply become aware of them as a mature adult...Just let it all happen, Vicky, and keep telling me just as much as you think I need to know to assist you."

" ...My stepmother didn`t like me..."

" We already know that - I want to talk to the subconscious mind now: use the index fingers to answer. Subconscious, is the incident of the stepmother refusing Vicky access to grammar school one of the incidents you`ve used to maintain the insomnia?"

Yes.

" Is it the incident that first set you on the path to the creation of the insomnia?"

No.

" Are you prepared to reveal that incident to the conscious mind?"

Yes.

" Then do so now, minimising all unpleasant emotions...And Vicky, keep me informed of what`s happening, please."

"...All that`s coming was..." She began to cry again. "...When my mother said she was leaving, my father chased her down the street with a bread knife..."

" Did he hurt your mother with the knife?"

" No...he...chased her..."

" Subconscious mind, is this incident the one that first set you on the path to creating the insomnia?"

Yes.

" Explain to Vicky now why you felt the need to create the insomnia..."

Seconds later, Vicky explained her insight.

" I had the bread knife...because I was frightened of my step-father..."

" Is this the man your mother went off with?"

" Yes...I was afraid he might hurt me..."

" Hurt you, how?"

" ...Sexually...He used to look at me that way...And other girls too...He had been in trouble because of it before...Touching young girls..."

" So you actually kept a bread knife near you as a defence?"

" Yes."

Vicky had become much calmer, and I sensed she now understood why the insomnia had been created - as a way of being ever-alert and vigilant in case her stepfather had made sexual advances in the night. The tinnitus similarly was used to keep her conscious, distracting her so that she wouldn`t drop her guard and go to sleep. This was also the purpose of the intense listening-out for tiny noises - in case one of those noises was the sound of her stepfather approaching.

Vicky`s subconscious mind verified all of this in the next, and final, session. Though at that moment all I needed to ask was:-

" Subconscious mind, does conscious-Vicky now have a complete understanding of why the insomnia and tinnitus were created for her?"

Yes.

" Is Vicky now in a position to make an informed choice and decision about whether or not to maintain the insomnia and tinnitus in her life?"

Yes.

Her wish, of course, was to be rid of these things. I asked her if she had any contact at all with her stepfather now, and she revealed that he had died a few years ago.

Then she smiled.

We did not, alas, get to the bottom of the blister-that-became-dry-skin. The subconscious mind absolutely refused to co-operate on that one, even though it was no more than a minor irritation in Vicky`s conscious life. This goes to show that what the subconscious regards as significant, and what the conscious mind thinks is important, can differ widely.

" But what about my life now?" Vicky asked as I showed her to the door for the last time. " Do I stay with my husband, go off with my boss, or do something different? It`s a problem."

" I`m not a marriage counsellor, so I can`t advise you," I said, resisting the temptation to tell her to sleep on it.

*

Chapter 10: The Direction We Steer.

One of the enduring questions of philosophy is whether the human mind can ever truly and fully understand itself. Well, I`m no more a philosopher than I am a marriage counsellor (But why? you might ask). All I do as a hypnotherapist is to allow people to understand themselves more, and with regard to the particular problems they bring for treatment.

I maintain a firm belief that what we erroneously call hypnosis - as I say, I prefer the term `quiet consciousness` or `inner attention` - has been around as long as human consciousness itself. One of the things that has allowed us to survive and proliferate on this planet is the tendency we have to try to understand. Of course, because most threats come from the outside, from the world itself, our conscious attention has evolved to be alert to such threats, and to understand them quickly - with the aid of our inbuilt map of reality. In that sense we can`t afford to indulge ourselves by drifting along in a daydream for long, under normal circumstances. And yet the capacity to explore the inner world of the mind and body I believe has always been with us, and up until fairly recent times seems to have been used extensively, world-wide, for a range of purposes.

I use various analogies to try to explain my model of the mind to clients who come for treatment. One of my favourites is the captain and crew (of the ship, which is the body). Virtually all of us like to feel that we have set ourselves a course in life - to be happy, healthy, wealthy, famous, or whatever - and that we can stick to this course, even if from time to time we have to make an adjustment due to temporary circumstances in life - changes in the weather or sea conditions, to keep our metaphor going.

But because most of us, the captains, focus our attention almost exclusively on the horizon, we fail to check with the crew that everything`s running smoothly below decks. Usually it is, and the crew go about their work efficiently. But problems can arise through this lack of communication. The crew may be operating the ship based on old instructions: indeed, sometimes on instructions that were not issued by the captain at all, if events occurred when the individual was still a child. In this instance, the crew will interpret the weather conditions themselves, and make their own additions or amendments to the charts - the unique map of reality that exists inside us all.

Until, or unless, the captain intervenes to check the map in light of a problem that comes along, the old instructions will dictate the direction the vessel takes, no matter how hard the poor bewildered captain hauls at the wheel on the bridge.

But once captain and crew are in clear communication on the matter, the nature of the inappropriate instructions or directions will be understood: the captain can decide whether those instructions are useful now, and if not s/he can issue new ones.

To me, this is the most logical, most efficient way of steering the course through life that will take us where we want to go.

*

All of these thoughts occurred to me again when I first saw Lilian for her asthma

(Pp ). At the time her beloved dog had died, she had wanted to cry, to go through the normal, natural and beneficial process of grieving. But her family had thought it `silly` to get upset over just a dog. And so, despite Lilian`s need, she had suppressed the grief of her loss - so that in her case, it was not even the captain of her ship that was steering the best course: other people had come on to the bridge and taken control of the wheel themselves!

Lilian returned for treatment of her other problems - angina, bowel trouble and eczema - a few weeks after we`d dealt with the asthma. During those two sessions, we had cleared up the pattern of behaviour itself, the inner reason why the asthma was created, and the beliefs that gave rise to that reason, but the actual physical symptoms had taken a while longer to fade. By the time I saw her on this occasion, she told me the asthma was not bothering her at all, " And for the past few days I`ve not needed to use my inhalers."

" That`s fine. Tell me a bit more about your other problems."

" Well, like I said to you before, my doctor told me my colitis went away - "

" The actual inflammation of the bowel lining faded, five years ago I remember you saying?"

" That`s right. But at the time, tests showed I had a bend in the colon where there shouldn`t be one, and it`s that which is causing my current bowel trouble."

" You know that for a fact?"

" My doctor told me so."

" OK, what about the eczema and the angina, Lilian."

" Well, I`ve had the angina for years. I can`t remember when it started. I take a tablet every lunchtime to keep it under control. But if it flares up and I get pain in my arms, I use this liquid and spray it under my tongue."

" And the eczema?"

" Well that`s been going for a few years too. It`s just on my hands, look here."

She showed me, and indeed the palms of her hands were very red.

" My doctor says the eczema is caused by stress and nerves."

" What particular stress does he mean?"

" I don`t know, he never said."

" Oh, and what does he mean by `nerves`? Are we talking about nervousness?"

" I don`t know."

" And, I wonder, nervousness with regard to what, in particular?"

" I don`t know."

I held myself back from becoming irritated with what struck me as being the casual use of these vague terms `stress` and `nerves`. It seemed to me that the doctor`s view had been dismissive: nerves and stress caused the eczema, so it was all in Lilian`s mind, so there wasn`t really very much that could be done about it, was there? At least that was my presumption, since she still had the eczema!

I don`t want to convey the impression that G.P.s can`t do their job. The best of them are highly professional I`m sure; kind, knowledgeable, and creative in finding ways of solving their patients` problems. Others seem to skirt round legitimate concerns, such as Lilian`s eczema, especially if they think they`re stress-related. Stress is something that happens in the mind, so you can`t do much about it except prescribe tranquillisers (which is becoming more socially unacceptable these days). And something like itchy skin isn`t serious enough to warrant expensive and prolonged psychoanalysis, so perhaps the safest approach is to tell the eczema sufferer to `take more time for herself, to relax more, let go of your worries...`

The fact that the cause of the worry, and thus of the eczema, might lie beyond the realm of conscious awareness, puts the solution to the problem right outside the province of many general practitioners.

" All right, Lilian, I`m not trying to put pressure on you. It`s just that I get a bit annoyed when people are told they have a problem because of `nerves`. That`s not a medical term, it`s very vague, and it isn`t at all helpful."

" I guessed you weren't best pleased," Lilian said with a wry smile.

Then we began the relaxation.

Because Lilian had responded so well previously, I used my quick induction method and we got straight down to work. The subconscious mind indicated it was prepared to co-operate in allowing us to understand the angina, and the eczema and bowel trouble.

" Thank you, subconscious. If I may, then, I`d like to begin with the bowel trouble, which Lilian has told me causes great distress in her life. But before we discuss this matter, I would like to check any link between the bowel trouble and what we have been calling colitis...Did you create colitis for Lilian to serve a purpose?"

Yes.

" I see. Is there any trace of colitis in Lilian`s body now?"

No.

" Does the purpose for which the colitis was created apply in Lilian`s life now?"

No.

" Based on all you know, subconscious, is there any situation that might arise in Lilian`s life that would cause you to recreate the colitis for her?"

No.

" Right. Will it serve any beneficial purpose for Lilian to know the circumstances that led you to create the colitis for her in the first place?"

No.

" OK, thank you. Subconscious, does any link exist in terms of common contributory incidents between the colitis you created for Lilian, and what we are now calling her bowel trouble?"

No.

" Is the bowel trouble a pattern of behaviour that you have created for a reason?"

No.

" Has anything occurred in Lilian`s life that caused you to allow the creation of her bowel trouble?"

No.

" Is the bowel trouble a purely physiological problem?"

Yes.

" Is the bowel trouble the result of the abnormal bend in Lilian`s colon?"

Yes.

" Is there anything you can do, subconscious, to rectify that abnormal bend?"

No.

" Is there anything you can do to eliminate the bowel trouble?"

Yes.

" That`s wonderful news. Are you willing and able to eliminate the bowel trouble completely from Lilian`s life?"

Yes.

" I`m delighted to hear this, and I know conscious-Lilian is too...Subconscious mind, is there anything in particular that the conscious mind needs to know or do to enable you to completely and permanently dispose of Lilian`s bowel-trouble?"

No.

Had the answer been Yes, then of course I would either have asked the subconscious to instruct the conscious mind accordingly, or I would have gone through my `control room` visualisation, which is a good general technique for allowing the conscious-self to issue a clear affirmation of the subconscious` intended actions-for-change.

" Subconscious mind, based on our discussions, I now instruct you to do whatever`s necessary, in the most effective way you know how, of disposing of the bowel trouble in Lilian`s lie completely and permanently - And ask you to go ahead with this work with my sincere thanks..."

Even though I have been practising hypnotherapy for a number of years, I still find it hard to believe that some cures can be so easy. This dialogue with Lilian`s subconscious, with regard to the bowel trouble, happened as it is here written down. It took around ten minutes to negotiate a solution to something that had been plaguing Lilian for years, and which had been a severely painful and debilitating problem.

Of course, you may ask - and have every right to ask - how do I know that such problems are cured?

Firstly, my experience has been that the subconscious is not deceitful. Once it has agreed to co-operate, it does so honestly and as effectively as it can under the circumstances (the circumstances being the precision of the hypnotherapist`s questioning, the willingness of the conscious mind to know and co-operate, and so on). There is no point in the subconscious fabricating answers - though as I`ve said previously, it will do so if the therapist asks leading questions or plants suggestions (`So when your Daddy bounced you on his knee when you were five, did he seem to be enjoying himself..?`), or if the conscious part of the mind wants to believe something and puts a pressure on the subconscious to come up with the goods. I suspect that Shirley did this with her reincarnation beliefs.

Secondly, I offer a free session to all clients who are not completely happy with their treatment. If within three months of our final session, the complete and permanent cure we have negotiated does not occur, then clients can come back for me to ask the subconscious `Why not?` I`ve had very few people return in this way. The only exception I make to my three-month rule is when symptoms take longer than three months to fade (I`ll describe a case of this next chapter).

Thirdly, an increasing number of clients contact me on the recommendation of others who have achieved good results through my work. In the early days, my clients came exclusively via the advertising I did in Yellow Pages and the local paper, and occasionally because of talks I gave or classes I ran. But I think that now upwards of half the cases I take on are from word-of-mouth. And let me state the obvious by saying that the people who come for hypnotherapy and achieve a cure, through myself or any other therapist, are not stupid or gullible; nor are they delusional. You can`t kid yourself that your asthma has gone, or pretend you aren`t troubled by agonising migraines, or fool yourself into thinking that you really have lost two stones in weight. And such cures have nothing to do with so-called positive thinking. While affirmations and so on can transmit powerful upbeat instructions to the subconscious mind, if the subconscious has established a behaviour for a reason, to try to override that reason purely by weight of repetition may result simply in setting up a subconscious conflict, or the substitution of the behaviour you`ve `wished away` for another behaviour that serves the same purpose. I like positive thinking, it helps me stay buoyant - but it can`t cure asthma in two ours, or a bowel problem in ten minutes.

I asked Lilian`s subconscious how long it needed to dispose of her bowel trouble, and the answer came back - between two and three weeks.

I then went on to ask about the angina. Like the bowel problem, it was not created for a purpose: the subconscious could not have prevented it manifesting in Lilian`s life. Despite this, and because it served no useful function, the subconscious indicated it could dispose of the angina problem. Again, Lilian`s conscious mind did not need to know or do anything in particular to effect this cure - so I went ahead and issued the instructions.

" Subconscious, we`ve made such astonishing progress during this session, and I do appreciate all the efforts you`re making to ensure that Lilian`s life is happier, healthier and enriched. Subconscious, the other item on my list here is the eczema on the palm of the hands. Would you be prepared to help us understand more about this?"

Yes.

" Thank you. Did you create the eczema on the hands as a pattern of behaviour for a purpose?"

Yes.

" I see. Is the eczema connected in any significant way for you to any of the other matters that Lilian has brought to me for treatment?"

Yes.

I went through the list, and was interested to note that the link was with the now-vanished colitis.

" Subconscious mind, since the colitis itself no longer serves a purpose in Lilian`s life, is there any further need for the eczema?"

No.

I negotiated the disposal. Since the eczema represented a once-purposeful pattern of behaviour that now ran `on automatic`, strictly speaking there was no need to understand the incidents that had contributed to its creation. Even so, I questioned the subconscious and it agreed to release those incidents if desired.

" I`m now addressing conscious-Lilian. Lilian, do you want to know what the incidents were, and how the eczema was linked to the colitis?"

She shook her head. " No, not really...But I`m understanding it in a general way... Yes, it`s to do with my colitis...so much matter and blood and pain...I was ready to give up on life..."

And she chuckled.

" It was stress and nerves, Steve! Stress and nerves..."

The subconscious mind indicated the bowel problem would vanish within a week. And a week later Lilian rang me to say that it had gone, as promised.

" It`s wonderful. Before, I was half-crippled with the discomfort. And I needed to be very careful where I went - I couldn`t find myself a couple of minutes away from a toilet. Can you imagine how awkward that is!"

" My mind boggles, Lilian. But I`m delighted you no longer have that inconvenience - pardon the pun."

Lilian was in such a good mood that even my terrible joke evoked a laugh.

" Well, the real test will come in a couple of weeks, Steve. For a few years now my daughter who lives out in Saudi with her husband, who works there, has been trying to persuade me to visit. She`ll pay my fare and everything. Well, until now the whole thing was out of the question, but because I feel so good, I`ve told her I`ll travel out after Christmas."

" That`s great news. I bet you`ll have a wonderful time."

" There is one thing, though...I`d like to come and see you about the flight. I`m a bit nervous..."

" Well, Lilian, I can send you one of my confidence tapes."

" No," Lilian said in that firm, quiet way she has, and with a broad Leicester accent. " I`d prefer to come and see you for a session."

We did the session shortly afterwards, and it took the form of what I call a `positive projection`, where the subconscious mind projects a vivid, powerful and reassuring impression into the conscious mind. Sometimes it takes the form of an image, often a pleasant memory, but in Lilian`s case she came out of hypnosis and described `a lovely calm feeling all over.`

I wished her well on her trip to Saudi, and as I watched her walk to her husband waiting in the car a few yards up the street, I couldn`t help but feel a tiny pang of worry on her behalf - just in case the cures hadn`t worked after all...

How could I have been so sceptical! Upon her return, Lilian called me to say she`d been fine the whole time, untroubled by any of the problems that had haunted her. And, upon hearing that I was to do another radio broadcast, she agreed to a phone-in to explain just how potent hypnotherapy can be.

*

In reading back through Lilian`s case, I realise that I don`t wish to create the impression that everyone who walks over my threshold will be cured of their ailments within a few weeks. As I have said, if subconscious co-operation can be gained, then the chances of success are very high. But I`ve also outlined earlier some of the `glitches` that can occur in treatment.

Perhaps the saddest and most frustrating kind of client is the one who so desperately needs help, and with equal desperation has scratched his way through a score of therapies, becoming increasingly convinced that nothing can be done for him.

I mention Ian`s case because it coincided with the startling success achieved with Lilian.

Actually, Ian had rung me a couple of months before, and after I`d outlined the structure of the treatment, he wondered if I could send him some `literature` about hypnosis and hypnotherapy, as well as some biographical material about myself.

" Well, I do have notes I could send you, but that`s no substitute for us meeting to discuss things."

" Yeah, I know. But I`m kind of shopping around at the moment, and I don`t want to commit myself too early on."

" Fine," I replied, not bothering to explain that my free first consultation represented no commitment, except by the client to himself. It was also the most effective way of covering a lot of ground quickly, in terms of the explanations I like to give prospective clients about hypnosis and its therapeutic uses.

" I`ll send you the sheets," I told Ian, and expected to hear no more from him.

When he called, he told me he`d like to come for an initial session.

" I`ve been reading around the subject, and I like what you`ve written: it makes sense."

" OK, good. I`ve got my diary handy here..."

" I did actually go to another hypnotherapist - he also did NLP - but I didn`t continue. He told me my problems stemmed from my father leaving the family when I was six."

" Is this something that was verified by talking to the subconscious mind?"

" No. I don`t think he talked to my subconscious at all. I just gave him details about my background when we first met..."

" Then you were right not to go back, in my opinion," I said. " Can you make next Wednesday, at six o`clock?"

Ian turned up twenty minutes early, and my wife had to show him into another room, as I was busy with another client. When eventually we met, I found Ian to be a young man, late-twenties, with a firm handshake and an easy smile.

" So," I said, " this is normally where I launch into my little lecture about what I do and how I do it. But since you seem to have an understanding of the basics, maybe I`ll start by wondering if you have any questions?"

Ian shook his head. " Not really. All I`ll say is that you`re the latest in a long line of people I`ve tried to find help. I`m beginning to think that nothing can be done."

" I`m interested to know why you haven`t found the solutions you`re looking for," I answered. " Surely out of all the people you`ve visited, you must have seen some very competent, caring and professional therapists?"

" Well, so I would have thought too. But here I am, with all the problems I had when I started..."

The easy smile turned on, and I began to suspect that Ian, being the common factor in his string of failures, was perhaps his own worst enemy.

" One of the sheets I sent you was called `Making the Most of your Hypnotherapy`," I reminded Ian. " It outlines an attitude to treatment that many clients have found useful in the past..."

" Um, yeah, I remember it, I think."

" On that sheet I quote Doctor Brian Roet from his book All In The Mind?, in which he advocates accepting that a problem exists, being eager for change, accepting that change is possible, and being prepared to commit yourself to attempting different methods of change..."

Ian waved me to silence, as though this was all old hat.

" There`s no need to tell me that a problem exists - I`ve got a whole string of them!"

" Yes, but I`m suggesting you may be having a problem in following the other guidelines."

Ian looked at me severely, and I knew of course that I was in danger of losing a client here. But the fact is, I was not prepared to waste my time and a client`s hard-earned money if that client was not willing to accept my help in the way I insisted on giving it.

I have strong views about this. In the world of complementary therapy - as in many others areas of life, I guess - enough woolly ideas, mystical flim-flam and outright charlatanism exist as it is. It`s easy for people to be drawn in to a world of persuasive arguments, wonderful claims of attracting wealth, power, perfect health, greater longevity, or what have you: and the sad fact is that they can end up spend huge amounts of time and money pursuing these holy grails, only to end up disappointed and disillusioned, with the tangled knot of their problems still firmly tied.

I was perfectly aware in talking with Ian, as I am in writing this book, that I am making claims that many people will find outrageous. Curing Lilian`s asthma, angina, bowel trouble and eczema in four sessions, for example, sounds almost miraculous. All I can say is that the capacity to achieve such healing lies within every individual, and that as a hypnotherapist all I do is to create the circumstances which allows that capacity to be utilised. I make no claims at all about being able to cure...All of the case studies in this book emphasise the ability of people to cure themselves, when the conditions are right.

And that`s why, in talking to Ian as I did, I was insisting on doing things my way. Because my fear was that if we wasn`t prepared to follow my instructions - basically, to allow me to talk to the subconscious about his problems - then he would deem the session and me a failure, and continue chasing his tail with his eventual chances of success diminished.

" Anyway," I went on. " if you decide that you want an initial session, we can do that here this evening. You`ll see how I induce hypnosis, and this will give me the chance to talk to your subconscious, explain the ethos of the treatment, and ask the subconscious mind for its co-operation. If it says yes, then I can begin approaching the problem that you currently find most intrusive in your life."

Ian gave a brief, brittle laugh. " You`ll be spoilt for choice!"

" You`re the one who decides which problem we tackle first. But I`ll also need to know what your other problems are, because they may be linked at a subconscious level. Actually, if they are, that`s good news, because in dealing with one, we`ll be dealing with the others at the same time and, if all foes well, we can resolve them `in a clump` as it were."

Ian nodded, grinned, and passed over a typewritten sheet he had previously prepared. It listed fourteen problems including a `compulsive disorder` he did not specify, anxiety, memory problems, perfectionism, a bladder problem, pains in the groin area and a wound on his thumb that would not heal.

" That`s quite a list," I told him.

" Pretty daunting, eh?"

" That prejudges the issue," I said. " The methods I use, as the result of my training and experience, are very straightforward and simple. All I can do, Ian, is to use those methods to try and set up a communication between the conscious and subconscious aspects of your mind. If that communication is established, then we can ask pertinent questions about these problems - "

" And if communication isn`t established?"

" Then it will be for a reason, one that you will perhaps already know about, or can find out about, I`m sure. Now, tell me if you want to proceed..."

" Don`t you want me to give you a medical history, or details of my family background?"

" At this stage, I feel I have all the information I need. All I want to do in this session is to allow you to experience hypnosis - "

" I`ve experienced it before."

" - And to talk initially with the subconscious. Ian, are you happy for me to get on with it?"

" Yes."

" Are you physically comfortable and feel settled?"

" Yes."

" Are you prepared to go along with my instructions?"

" Yes."

" Fine. Let`s begin."

On a first session, I induce hypnosis by giving the client a preamble, which really explains what is to follow, while the individual stares at a picture above my head. The induction itself follows the classic counting method, interspersed with the word `sleep`, which creates associations of tranquillity and drowsiness. Then I direct the conscious mind`s point-of-attention by having the client imagine various things, their hand, or a safe, comfortable place, in fine detail, through all the sensory modalities - sight, hearing, touch, etc.

This works in most cases. Where it doesn`t, I subsequently try a quick induction method which accesses the subconscious without invoking the idea of relaxation at all. Fundamentally, hypnosis is achieved by bypassing or suspending the tendency of the conscious mind to judge and evaluate incoming or outgoing information; and then by focusing the conscious mind on the outgoing information, which basically consists of impressions coming from the subconscious. In other words, you allow the conscious mind to swing round like a compass needle, away from the here-and-now of the outside world, to the there-and-then of the subconscious map of reality. The individual becomes much more sensitive to subtle thoughts and feelings in a state of quiet consciousness. And as I say, if this doesn`t work slowly, with the classic induction, it will work quickly before the sceptical consciousness has time to argue about it!

In Ian`s case, I feared that no technique I might use would work.

Even as I began my preamble, he had closed his eyes and was doing some `deep breathing`, obviously following instructions he had been given by previous therapists, or in line with what he believed hypnosis ought to feel like! In other words, he was consciously anticipating what should be happening; consciously controlling the state he was in; not letting me do the work.

I went through the usual helium-balloon routine, and was actually surprised when I obtained a very faint, but truly subconscious, response from the Yes index finger. This, however, quickly faded as Ian`s conscious mind became aware of what was happening and sought to control it.

The approach I took then was to speak to the conscious mind, asking if it gave permission for the subconscious to respond to us; and if it was willing to let that response come through the index fingers, as instructed.

" Yes," Ian said, to both questions.

I tried again, and although Ian reported that his arms were `twitching like mad`, I was not getting the clear responses we needed.

At this stage - and it happens with a minority of clients - I ask the conscious to become actively involved, by passively observing what the subconscious has to say (that is, just looking at those helium balloons without influencing them), but consciously amplifying the response by lifting up one or other of the index fingers.

" I can`t feel anything. Neither of those balloons are moving..."

There are several other techniques I use - other tools in the toolbox - but to attempt them all in one session smacks of desperation, and in any case I could see that Ian simply wasn`t allowing himself to go along with the process.

Our session time was running out by now, so I asked the subconscious to project a positive impression, then I counted Ian back to wakefulness - although in my view he`d never been anything but fully awake and conscious throughout!

" I didn`t think it would work," were his first words as he opened his eyes.

" Well there you are - you`ve just conveyed a powerful message to your subconscious mind to that effect. How many times have you done that in the past? Did you get the positive impression we asked for?"

" No, nothing....I couldn`t feel my hands at all, you know, and all of that twitching. What does it mean?"

" My own opinion is that a tension had been set up. The subconscious was trying to respond in the way we`d asked, by sending nerve impulses down to the index fingers, but the conscious mind was blocking these, so causing the twitching in the arms."

" I was trying not to interfere."

" Not-trying is still trying," I said. " You were trying to be in hypnosis, with the result that your conscious mind was fully alert and awake. You did not allow yourself to drift along on my words."

" I was trying to avoid becoming conscious of the balloons - "

" I repeat what I just said. Trying-not-to still constitutes effort. Besides, at one stage I deliberately asked you to be aware of those balloons - but I assume you went on trying-not-to?"

Ian grinned a little sheepishly.

" So, what now?" he asked.

" Now I give you my standard relaxation tape. Play it every day for a week or two: get used to the routine of slipping into that state of quiet consciousness. Then if you want to continue treatment with me, give me a call and we`ll book a further appointment."

" I`ve failed, haven`t I?"

" No. Failure isn`t falling down, but staying down. Just allow yourself to let go into the mental state you call hypnosis - you do it every time you drift off to sleep, or lapse into a daydream. It`s nothing special. Help yourself by not trying to help yourself at all."

" OK, I`ll try," Ian said, and I sighed audibly.

" Don`t forget to play the tape," I reminded him as I saw him to the door...

We can all, much more powerfully, be the masters of our own destiny. Instead of putting up with the way things are, if we aren`t happy with them, we can change them. `The reality of the situation` is largely of our own making. As captain of the ship, we can choose the direction we steer. We need the help of the crew, of course, but all we need to do is talk to them...

I found a message on my answer phone after lunch the next day. It was from Ian.

" I`ve decided not to go ahead with any more sessions. I don`t think you can help me. I`ll send your tape back through the post."

*

Chapter 12: I Am Going To Be Well.

Earlier on (P ) I mentioned positive thinking, and indicated that of itself, it can`t (or can`t easily) facilitate the resolution of conflicts expressed by specific sets of symptoms. If we take, for example, the problem of overweight: positive thinking per se, I argue, will not readily allow the reason of why the subconscious mind is maintaining the problem to come to light. You might well repeat to yourself each day, ` I am going to be slim, I am going to be slim!`. But if you look back at a case of overweight like Sarah`s (P ), you wonder how often she would need to repeat her affirmation to realise the unique reason for overweight in her life.

Positive thinking tends to be all about conscious input. We think positively that `Every day in every way I get better and better`, but if as the days go by we look in the mirror and begin to wonder if indeed we are getting better, then conscious evaluation and judgement have set in - which most commonly leads to doubt. And as soon as doubt enters the equation, it negates the positive aspect of the original affirmation.

Also, positive change requires a process of education. We need to learn in order to change. And yes, of course we learn from the world outside. But most importantly, where profound, personal and particular changes are sought, we need most of all to learn from ourselves: we need to ask Why. No amount of straight input, unless it is in the form of questions designed to find out Why, can realistically hope to effect those changes.

Believe me, I am not knocking the benefits of positive thinking. But at the very least it has to be properly applied (read, for example, Dr J. Murphy`s The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind, or Hill & Stone`s Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude - see Bibliography). It also has to be coupled with techniques that balance the input of positive affirmations with the elicitation of output in the form of understandings from the subconscious.

Having said all of that, what positive thinking can do, immediately and effectively, is to maintain a buoyant conscious attitude towards realising that change is possible, and exploring different avenues of change until success is achieved.

It was just this attitude that Christine brought to me (Pp ) when she came to see if hypnotherapy could do something for her overweight. She also told me about her skin cancer, currently in remission, her confidence problem, and what a psychiatrist had diagnosed as `chronic depression.`

" I didn`t go back to him," Christine confessed. " When he used the word `chronic`, I took it to mean I`d have the problem forever...And when you`re told you`re depressed, it sounds as though things are out of control. I hate to think of myself as chronically depressed."

" When I was first training in hypnotherapy, we were often told - you are responsible for what you say, but not for what other people hear. We all overlay our unique interpretations upon everything. That`s why I never put loaded suggestions into my clients` minds: and that`s why I always get them to put a name to the problem."

" You mean, I`m not chronically depressed - I mean, it`s not going to last forever, and it`s not out of control?...Oh, I don`t know what I mean!"

We both laughed at that.

" There`s no need to get tangled up in this, Christine. What I`m saying is that if you don`t like the term `chronic depression`, then we don`t have to use it. It`s how you feel that counts, not how someone else labels things. Call the problem what you like. But in any case, we`ll ask the subconscious if it`s happy with the term we choose."

" Will that make a difference?"

" It could make all the difference, given that the subconscious mind probably created the pattern of behaviour we`re currently calling depression for a purpose..."

I saw the flash of scepticism in her eyes, and asked her;

" Well, were you born feeling like this?"

" I can`t remember - "

" Stop playing games."

" No, I suppose I wasn`t born depressed."

" And did you consciously decide to become depressed and stay depressed?"

" No."

" And did your body, by whatever mechanism it uses - hormones or whatever - suddenly feel depressed one day, all by itself?"

" I doubt it."

" So where did the depression come from? My answer is that it comes from a part of the mind which is not your adult conscious awareness. Purely for convenience. I call that not-conscious part the subconscious. Now, let`s move on to talk about your other problems."

" Well, since we`re talking about psychiatrists and things; when I went to my G.P. about what was later called chronic depression, I told him I was tired and often felt down. This led to me catching colds and stuff - all the bugs that went round the office. The doctor said my immune system was weakened. Is this a problem we can tackle?"

" Quite likely, given subconscious help. One of my clients was a lady who was always catching colds, doses of flu, and what have you. We called her problem `a tendency to infection.` Her subconscious indicated that this was a pattern of behaviour, created for a purpose, based on a subconscious belief that the symptoms were needed. We got to the root of the problem and resolved it - though it was tied in with other problems - as your weakened immune system may be in your case.

" I don`t know, Christine," I went on, " if you`ve heard of an emerging branch of medical science called psychoneuroimmunology?"

Christine made a grimace, and I chuckled.

" I know, it`s a word I can only say if I don`t think too hard about it. Basically, it explores the links between our state of mind and the state of our immune systems - our biological defence mechanisms against infection. Results indicate there`s a direct connection between the mental and the physical. But then, hypnotherapists have been saying this for years!

" The point I`m making is that all the physical symptoms you`re experiencing are linked with what`s going on in your mind. That`s the foundation on which hypnotherapy stands - together with the idea that you are the only one who knows what`s going on in your mind: or rather, can be enabled to know, in order to find the solutions you seek."

We went on to chat briefly about Christine`s other problems. Her overweight had preceded her skin cancer, for which she had had surgery. One of the specialists she`d seen had told Christine that her tendency to cancerous skin had arisen because of over-exposure to the hot sunlight she`d experienced during her childhood in Australia. She remembered suffering one quite severe case of sunburn. Christine wondered, based on that, whether her cancer could in fact have possibly been created by her subconscious mind: couldn`t it have arisen purely as the result of exposure to sunlight.

" I`m not going to comment before we`ve talked to the subconscious. What I will say, though, is that our bodies are merely mortal. Certainly outside influences can overwhelm our defences, and I have no doubt that cancer can occur in people despite the best efforts of the body`s defences to prevent it. Those defences, of course, are monitored and controlled by the subconscious - so the subconscious can itself be overwhelmed, because it is only human, like the rest of us. But let`s not pre-empt what we are going to learn - if you`re ready to begin, Christine..."

Based on our `pre-relaxation chat`, one of the first questions I asked Christine`s subconscious was whether it was happy to use the term `chronic depression`.

No.

" I see. That`s fine, subconscious mind. Would you then please suggest a term that you prefer to use?"

Yes.

" Would you suggest this term to us right now, using Christine`s voice so that I can learn too?"

Yes.

" Go ahead, and thank you..."

Christine was deeply relaxed. Her facial muscles were slack, and her breathing was slow and very deep. It took her some moments to mobilise herself to speak.

"...Hurt..." she said at last.

" Subconscious, are you telling us that the term you prefer to use instead of `chronic depression` is `hurt`?"

" Yes."

" All right. Use the index fingers to answer me now...Since `hurt` is the name you choose to give to one of the difficulties I wish to discuss with you, am I right in thinking that the hurt is not a pattern of behaviour you created for a purpose in Christine`s life?"

Yes.

" Is it the case, then, that what we are now calling hurt is your response to events which have happened in Christine`s life?"

Yes.

" Right. And is the hurt in Christine`s life significantly linked as far as you`re concerned to any or all of the other matters she has come here to investigate?"

Yes.

We went on to establish that the `hurt` was linked with all of the other problems Christine had brought to me; the overweight, the cancer and the lack of confidence. As I`d told previous clients, linked problems were better, insofar as in dealing with one you dealt with them all.

Even so, if the problems represented different aspects of an overall condition, it was still necessary to see how those separate threads had been woven together. And since Christine had come to me principally for overweight, that was the aspect we dealt with first.

Her responsive subconscious indicated that the overweight was a pattern of behaviour created as a protection for Christine against emotional harm. I asked if this was the same thing as what Christine understood by the term `comfort eating`, and was told in effect that there was more to it than that.

The subconscious went on to agree to begin communicating an understanding of the circumstances that led to the overweight: full understanding would take longer than the time we had left, but significant insights could be offered within the remaining ten minutes.

Upon fully waking, Christine reported that she`d just had a dream of a house, which had been her Aunt Edie`s house when she was a child.

" Do you understand the significance of that dream?" I wondered. Christine shrugged.

" No, but I know it is significant: there`s no doubt in my mind about that..."

At the start of our next session, Christine was able to elaborate on the story.

" I`ve had more dreams," she told me happily. " I know why I`m fat. My problem is bread and butter - "
" I won`t spread it round," I said, evoking a groan.

" Even now, and for years, I tuck into bread and butter when I`m upset and stressed. When I was little - I mean young, not slim - Aunt Edie would give me home-made bread and lashings of butter. `Bread and butter will make you better,` she used to say. And I guessed I believed her..."

" That sounds like comfort eating," I replied. " But you also said that there was more to it than that - or rather, your subconscious did."

" Yes, I`m sure that`s right...I feel there`s more to it: it`s like something I can`t quite see yet...But interestingly, when I was undergoing my cancer treatment, my doctor said it was a good job I was overweight; because the cancer had eaten into the fatty tissue of my face, tissue which was easily and safely removed, rather than into muscle and nerves and bone..."

" Now that`s fascinating," I said, thinking aloud, " and if we assume that the subconscious mind always does things for reasons..."

Christine`s mouth dropped open. " You can`t be suggesting that my subconscious created overweight because it knew that one day it would create cancer!"

" Far be it from me to put ideas into your head. It may be that if the subconscious created the cancer, it chose for it to happen in fatty facial tissue rather than other, more vital tissues, because that would be safer. Anyway, I`d need to be persuaded the whole thing is a coincidence."

As I was talking, Christine`s gaze had drifted away from me: she was miles away, and I let her daydreaming run its course.

" It`s really odd," she muttered. " But my overweight actually comes in phases..I`m not always this big...And I`m most overweight when I have a crisis in my life; moving job, or promotion, or moving house, or relationship problems...Perhaps that`s where the idea of comfort eating comes in...But thinking about it, I`ve had my bouts of cancer at the same times too..."

She looked right at me and smiled, astonished.

" This is ridiculous! It can`t be right - can it?"

" We don`t know enough to say. So why don`t we find out a bit more right now?"

I used my quick induction and we got straight to work.

The first thing I did was to verify that the understandings that Christine had so far received were accurate and true - that is, that she had consciously interpreted them accurately.

Then I checked further on the `Aunt Edie` incident, and learned that what Christine`s aunt had said constituted a contributory incident, but not the first incident in the creation of the overweight.

" Now with regard to the other contributory incidents that you have used to create and maintain the overweight in Christine`s life, subconscious; are some of those incidents currently unknown to the conscious mind - in other words, incidents that cannot be readily remembered by conscious-Christine?"

Yes.

" Are you prepared to allow those incidents to come forward into conscious awareness?"

Yes.

There was, however, a difficulty, which lay in the conscious part of the mind. When I asked about this, conscious-Christine answered me.

" I`m scared to look back at my childhood...Dad was brilliant, but Mum used to beat the crap out of us...And she was always criticising...Nothing I did was ever good enough for her...I don`t want to go through that again..."

As I had done with numerous other clients, so I explained to Christine now that she would not have to relive any unpleasant incidents, but simply understand their significance. I said that she could do this in any way she chose.

" You could imagine that these incidents are described in a diary, for example. And to learn about them, you could simply read about them...Or you could imagine conscious-you sitting in a movie theatre, watching another conscious-you watching little Christine from years ago having those experiences...Or you could invite somebody into your conscious mind, somebody you love and trust, who could tell you about the incidents you need to understand.

" In any case, Christine, whatever experiences have been put together to create your problems - you survived those experiences. You`re here with me today, sitting in a warm room, in a comfortable sofa; perfectly safe. The information we need is just a bunch of old memories as far as you`re concerned. They won`t be anything like as traumatic as the original incidents...But Christine, you know very well that the choice is yours. Do you give permission for the subconscious to allow you to understand?"

She sat quietly for some moments, then slowly nodded her head.

" Yes. I give permission. I am going to be well, Steve, so I want to learn about those incidents."

Given that commitment, I issued my instructions to the subconscious, indicating that the right index finger should lift when the work was complete, which it did so several minutes later. All through this period of what must have been intense inner activity, Christine`s features remained relaxed and passive, so that it was difficult for me to assess the nature and strength of the emotions she was experiencing.

Finally, the finger response came.

" Conscious-Christine, do you now have a clearer understanding about the overweight?"

" Yes."

" And do you know more about the cancer?"

" Yes?"

" Are you prepared to tell me what you`ve learned?"

" Yes...Lots to say..."

" Would you prefer to be out of hypnosis, then, when you tell me these things?"

She nodded. " Yes..."

I thanked the subconscious for its help so far, and counted Christine out of hypnosis. As she came back to full wakefulness, a tear welled up from each eye and trickled down her cheeks. She wiped the tears away, and smiled at me.

" That was amazing..."

" You got lots of information?"

" Yes, plenty. It wasn`t like ping - not like a sudden flash of understanding, but a lot of odd little memories...I understand more, but I think there`re other things that are still hidden."

" Well, waiting in the wings. I`m sure your subconscious mind isn`t deliberately hiding stuff, based on its responsiveness so far. It`s just that lives are complex affairs, and it takes time both for the subconscious to release information - having considered the consequences of that release - and for the conscious mind to put stuff together in a way that makes rational sense...So, would you like to tell me anything more?"

" Can I have more than one reason for being fat?"

I chuckled. " You can have as many as you like! Have you had an insight into something other than the `Aunt Edie Syndrome`?"

" Mm, yes. I don`t think I`ve really explained to you, Steve, how obsessive I am in my work...Or have been. I`ve planned things with my partner, and we`re selling-up: I`m quitting my job and we`re moving to the West Country, where I can concentrate on my writing, and Mike can pursue his interests - he`s a craftsman."

" Direct positive action," I said, beaming. " And radical action too. I`m all for it, and I`m delighted you`re doing so much to change the direction of your life - to be what you want to be."

" In my current work, I`m just a component in a terrible machine; burning myself out in the rat race - and for what? What has it brought me except a big house and all this ill health!"

" It was the same kind of view that led me to quit my day job and become a hypnotherapist, and spend more time on my writing. If I hadn`t, I think my the foundation of my health would have crumbled under me too...Anyway, this isn`t about me, it`s about you - "

" Yes, but it`s good for me to know that you`re a kindred spirit, Steve; that you understand why I`ve been as I`ve been..."

" And that has something to do with your overweight?"

" With my overweight, my cancer - Good Lord, with everything!"

" OK, take your time: I need to write this stuff down!"

" As I said, I am - was - obsessive in my work. I`m in charge of a number of people, but I`m accountable to people too. I write a lot of reports - and I`m a perfectionist. I realise now that perfectionism stems from my childhood; but the immediate point is that I eat when I`m feeling under pressure; and I feel under pressure because I need things to be just right - so that people won`t criticise me..."

Christine`s voice faltered and the tears reappeared. " Oh, I feel so stupid taking about this!"

" Why is that? I don`t think you`re being stupid. I think you`re doing exactly the right thing, letting these memories out into the light."

" But why am I so upset? I feel like a little girl who`s been criticised?"

" Answer your own question, Christine. What memories are you recalling now, to make you feel like a little girl who`s being criticised?"

" I was a mistake," she confessed. " Mum and Dad hadn`t planned me. They had to get married because I was on the way...I didn`t find this out until I was twenty. Up until then, I thought I`d been adopted...In the hypnosis just now, I`ve re-remembered things - does that make sense? - It`s like I`ve looked at things again that I`ve known about before. But now there`s a different arrangement. I`m seeing things in a new light - "

" The light of your present circumstances, and the adult conscious you in the here-and-now," I added.

" The thing is, I`ve always thought I was never good enough. Never worthy enough. Everything revolves around that...At school, for example...I remembered just now one time when I got ninety-five percent in a test, and when I told Mum she looked cross and said, `So what happened to the other five percent?`...And on another occasion, Mum had to fetch me from school because I wasn`t feeling well. I was quite ill, in fact; I can`t remember what was wrong, but I needed to go to hospital. They did tests and everything, but couldn`t find anything the matter. Mum was exasperated. She said, `So you can`t even get being ill right!` I can see the look on her face now, as she said it..."

It wasn`t for me to make any comment on these things. These were Christine`s understandings; the roots that had grown into the spreading weed of her ill health and unhappiness...But I sighed inwardly at the cruelty some parents show to their children; the unthinking criticisms - or worse, the deliberate intention to damage.

" I see how things like this could have hurt you so deeply," I said.

" I remember something else..." Christine seemed almost to be talking to herself now, reinterpreting these memories in the light of her new determination to be free of their influence.

" I used to write poems, long ago, at school. I think that`s where my love of writing stemmed from...Well, the teacher got us all to write poems to put on the wall as part of a display for open day. When I went round the school with my Mum, we noticed my poems weren`t there on the wall in the classroom. Mum mentioned this, and the teacher - very patronisingly and cruelly, I see now - said they weren`t good enough to put up. She said that I would make a good wife one day, but not much else...How dare she! How dare she make those pronouncements about my life!"

The anger flared and faded. Christine glanced at me self-consciously. " I should have lost my temper then, not now..."

" Losing it now`s better than nothing. As you know, Christine, I was teacher too, so I speak from some experience when I say that that woman should have been hauled in front of the head and school governors for her callous, prejudicial and hurtful remarks. How inept she was, not to consider the impact those words would have on you."

" She said it quite sweetly, as though she was being nice..."

" Maybe she truly thought that `little Christine` would make a good wife. Even so, how dare she presume to know what your future ought to be like...But people are always pontificating about other people`s lives, as though they somehow know better. What other things have come to mind?"

" When I`m fat, I`m cuddly and nice!" Christine laughed. " That was one powerful impression that occurred to me. I realise that over the years I`ve dropped into the classic stereotype of the jolly-fat-person."

" You believed the hype!"

" I guess I did. But I see that eating for comfort doesn`t solve the problem...And of course I want to be liked, but I don`t need to be fat for people to like me. Personality is more than skin deep!"

" Absolutely."

" And what Aunt Edie said...`Bread and butter will make you better...` It didn`t stop me being ill with my cancer and my `depression` and my colds and coughs. I don`t need to be fat at all..."

" Did you get any insights about the link between the overweight and cancer?"

" Not really. I`ve always had freckly skin, and my facial cancer actually started as a freckle which first changed when I was about sixteen. It didn`t do anything, it just seemed to change. I was twenty-five before it started growing and spreading. We went to see a specialist - and oddly, at that time I also had quite a bad skin rash, which disappeared the day after the appointment. Anyway, the specialist asked all about my background, and when he learnt I`d spent time in Australia, he said that I had absolutely no sun tolerance at all."

" That may be true," I said, " but was he saying that the exposure to sunlight had caused your cancer?"

Christine shrugged. " I can`t remember. But I do tend to stay out of the sun...Being a fantasy writer, I`m much more of a night person!"

" OK," I grinned. " Anything else?"

" Yes, something odd...I have another problem which I didn`t tell you about."

" Why not?"

" Well, because I didn`t think you could do anything about it."

" Maybe I can`t - but I can certainly ask your subconscious about it. What`s the problem?"

" Well, there are two problems actually..."

" Now, Christine," I said, holding up a warning finger. " Are you sure there are only two other problems you want to tell me about?"

" Um, yes - unless you count the state of my finances!"

" Oh, well I`m afraid I`ll be adding that problem by charging you my regular fee. But seriously, what are they?"

" Right. The less serious one is an allergy to garlic. If I eat garlic inadvertently I feel sick, and I react with a kind of nettle rash..."

" All right, I`ll add `allergy to garlic` to the list. The other problem?"

" Well, during the course of all the tests and consultations I`ve had for my other ailments, I`ve been told that my thyroid gland and my adrenal gland are not working in phase with one another."

" I didn`t know they needed to," I commented.

" Neither did I; but apparently they do. I`m not affected by this in any way I can feel, except my doctor said that because of this out-of-phase problem, I would find it much harder to lose weight than other people. And he`s right, because I`ve been on all kinds of diets and weight-loss regimes, and nothing has worked for long...So I was just wondering how this gland thing would affect me when my subconscious agrees to get rid of the overweight?"

" Interesting point. As usual, my answer to you is that we`ll ask the subconscious. But not today. Since our time is now limited, if you agree, my intention is to put you briefly into hypnosis, so that I can request that the subconscious continues to offer understandings about your overweight and cancer, but in such a way that you will not need to experience hurt to any great extent. How does that sound?"

Christine nodded, and said a little sadly, " There`s a Latin quotation I remember from somewhere - sunt lacrimae rerum, events have tears. All the hurt has been done to me, Steve. I`m not going to let it happen again. All I`m concerned about now is get rid of the effects of the hurt from my past..."

*

When Christine saw me a week later, she was excited and full of energy. We had met on a writing course: Christine was not local to me, and indeed travelled nearly a hundred miles each way for each of her appointments.

" My head`s full of it! Even on the journey up here, I was still putting things together in my head...Steve, I know why the cancer comes - I know why I`ve got it!"

" All right, that`s wonderful. But look, come in off the doorstep. Sit down, let me make you a cup of tea, and we`ll talk..."

Five minutes later she had calmed down, though was still bubbling with news.

" It`s a protection," she said simply, sipping her tea. " The cancer was created as a protection...Every time I`ve made an important life change, the cancer has flared up. It`s there to try to force me to stop!"

" But you`ve just made another life change," I said, frowning, " planning to move to the West Country, quitting your job - "

She laughed. " Yes, but in the past I`ve made the wrong changes! I was in the rat race, and the only changes I ever made were to run faster and harder in the same race! It`s all very clear now...All my life, Steve, I`ve done things for other people, never for me. I was always trying to please someone, to make them feel I was worthy. I always tried to be fulfilled, through others, by what I did, rather than being fulfilled because of who I am...It all goes back to my mother. Deep down, I hated my mother...When things were bad with us, I really worked myself to death...I really worked twice as hard, to try and be twice as good for her. But I never could be - I could never muster that final five percent!

" That`s why I was having trouble with my novel, initially," Christine went on. " I kept going back to revise it - to make it better - even as I was trying to write it. The old urge for perfectionism wouldn`t leave me alone."

" Can you let go of it now? Because nobody`s perfect, nor should ever aspire to be."

She nodded. " Yes, I can let go of it. I know I can be well. And the change I`ve made in quitting work and being a writer, that`s a change in the right direction. My subconscious won`t give me cancer for that. And I know I`ve done things at the right time: last year, not a week went by when I wasn`t ill with something or other. If I`d gone on bashing my head against the wall of being perfect, God knows what would have happened to me by now...I think the cancer would have come back, and some!"

" The subconscious trying desperately to reassert its message..."

" Yes, I understand that now. But there`s more - can I tell you about it?"

" Fire away."

" You know when you asked the subconscious to pass on information in a way that wouldn`t hurt me? Well, it`s happened by me having lots of dreams - "

" All of us always have lots of dreams."

" Yes, but I`ve been remembering lots of them, far more than normal, and putting bits of them together afterwards, like, through the day - just as I did on the journey up here. Don`t you see, because the information doesn`t hit me in the face, as it were, it doesn`t upset me. When it first arrives, it`s all jumbled, as dreams tend to be; and making sense of it afterward is like doing a jigsaw puzzle - sort of an intellectual exercise, which again doesn`t hit me with the hurt."

" Your subconscious has been very kind, and very inventive," I observed. " But then, that doesn`t surprise me at all."

" I`ll tell you about a couple of my dreams. One that I had was about a little girl - that little girl was me, by the way. Across the room she could see a kind of fishing net, all filled up with glass spheres. Whenever she tried to walk towards them, they would suddenly be broken. As she walked backwards, away from them, they became whole again. What I understand is that the glass spheres are all the things in my life that were broken; all the delicate wishes and feelings that were smashed. Approaching them forced me to see the damage - which is why I`ve resisted looking back to my childhood. The net itself is the way I`ve kept all that bad stuff contained."

" That`s obviously a very important dream to understand."

" Yes, but the interesting thing is that it`s based on a real incident...Years ago, when I was about the same age as the girl in the dream, I bought my Mum some Christmas decorations; little glass balls in a net-bag. I thought that was pretty neat, to buy Christmas baubles as a Christmas present. The trouble was, after Mum opened them, she found that one of them had broken...And so..."

Christine`s voice caught and she glanced away from me.

" And so, because of that, she broke the rest of them in a temper."

" That`s awful...So the dream was partly literally true?"

" Yes, but the subconscious has also used it as a metaphor of all the things in my life that were damaged."

" I see that. The subconscious, I think, often generalises about the world from specific incidents that happen. But it also used the dream to help you come to terms with the Christmas bauble incident."

" But there was a worse dream...I used to be a Catholic. I was brought up a Catholic, and although I don`t have anything against the Catholic faith, it didn`t work for me. Mum used to lay the guilt thing on me, Original Sin and all that...I used to have a recurring dream, which didn`t come back for years - "

" But it`s come back this week, right?"

Christine smiled wanly.

" Oh yes. The dream is about a school trip. I used to go on many school trips - except this wasn`t a school trip at all. The coach driver was really the Devil, and he was taking all of us children away to be pitchforked into hell. That terrified me, and I remember always feeling that God or the Devil was watching me, to make sure I was good...I recall once falling down in the street when I was out shopping with Mum. I only tripped on the pavement, but Mum said it was God paying me back for being silly or bad."

Christine gave a snort of derisive laughter. " Why should God, who created the whole universe for goodness` sake, pay back a little girl in such a petty vindictive way! `Course, I can see that now. But at the time I believed it. The odd thing is, when I did hurt myself, that`s the only time Mum would seem to care for me...When I hurt myself, or when I was ill. It was a nice change to have Mum caring for me instead of criticising me. I didn`t need to be anything for her, except ill - and she would care for me...

" There were such strange and powerful influences...When I was younger, something in me just wouldn`t allow me to agree with my Mum. I suppose the battle lines had been drawn: and yet while I worked myself to death to try to please her, I stood in opposition to her, and wouldn`t cry for her - I wouldn`t cry! Because I believed that if I cried, Mum would think I was sorry for something or other that I was done...I wasn`t sorry. Why should I be sorry?

" Anyway, there it is. Inwardly at least, I`ve had a very eventful week."

" Sounds to me like you`ve made great progress."

" I feel I have...And it all boils down to the fact that, in the past, I couldn`t accept I wasn`t bad. People told me I was bad, or that I`d only make `a good wife`, but nothing else. But I wasn`t bad. It wasn`t my fault. All the stuff just happened."

" So you see now why you felt so hurt?"

" Oh yes, I know why I was hurt. I was hurt, my subconscious was hurt - "

" It amounts to the same thing."

" But it wasn`t my fault..."

" No, it wasn`t Christine. You were just a child trying to understand the world, trying to live as happily and successfully as you could. Which is all any of us can endeavour to do."

*

Before Christine settled into relaxation, I asked her about her allergy to garlic. Her subconscious mind had revealed that to...

" Oh, that`s a simple one. The allergy was created to save embarrassment! The incident that caused it was one time I was given something with loads of garlic in it. I felt sick, I rushed to the toilet and was sick, and later I had diarrhoea, with all the attendant noises and pongs, if you take my meaning! This was at the house of some friends, and my embarrassment was acute. That`s why I developed the allergy, as a kind of `early warning` to tell me there was garlic in the dish."

" That`s the subconscious being eminently practical again...Do you want to keep your early warning defence mechanism?" I wondered.

" No. I`m grown up now, I can decide for myself. I don`t think I`ll ever like the taste of garlic, and I`ll probably avoid food with it in. But I want the choice, and I don`t want the overreaction of a skin rash, which actually is just as embarrassing as throwing up!"

" Fair enough..."

" And I must tell you," Christine said. " My subconscious woke me up to tell me about the garlic incident - "

" You had another dream about it?"

" No, I woke up because I was itching. My skin had developed exactly the kind of nettle-type rash I get as a reaction to garlic. Once I was awake, I realised I knew the answer to the problem...Though I didn`t go back off to sleep, because all sorts of other ideas started coming to me then, about the cancer and overweight. By morning, the allergy rash had faded. No trace of it now."

" Did you get anything with regard to the thyroid and adrenal gland working out of phase?"

" No, nothing at all that I remember."

" All right," I said. " Now you know, Christine, that I never put suggestions into my clients` heads about their problems, or the solutions to those problems...But I`m going to make a little prediction here about this out-of-phase problem. I`ll write something down on this scrap of paper. Afterwards, I`ll let you see what it says. OK, now let`s get on with our relaxation..."

Christine entered hypnosis with effortless ease, and the first thing I did was to clear up the allergy to garlic. The subconscious agreed that there was no need for the pattern of behaviour to continue in Christine`s life, and also agreed therefore to dispose of it within a month.

" Thank you, subconscious, now with regard to the linked matters of Christine`s overweight and the skin cancer: she seems to have gained a very comprehensive understanding of the circumstances that led you to create and maintain those patterns of behaviour - and I`m grateful that you`ve communicated that understanding so effectively, and yet with such kindness and consideration.

" Subconscious, does conscious-Christine now have a full and complete understanding of the overweight and cancer in her life?"

Yes.

" And as a result of that full understanding, is she in a position to make an informed choice and decision about whether she wants those patterns of behaviour to continue in her life?"

Yes.

" Right. And if her decision is to dispose of those patterns of behaviour, completely and permanently, would you be prepared to do the necessary work to implement that decision?"

Yes.

" Fine, thank you. Before we go ahead and find out from conscious-Christine what her decision will be, I`d like to discuss with you the matter of that we`re calling the thyroid gland and the adrenal glands working out of phase...Subconscious, have you created this condition as a pattern of behaviour to serve a purpose?"

Yes.

" OK. Is the pattern of behaviour we`re referring to linked to the pattern of behaviour we`re calling overweight?"

Yes.

" OK. Subconscious, would you be prepared, right here during this relaxation, to reveal to conscious-Christine the purpose for which you created the condition we`re calling the thyroid gland and the adrenal glands working out of phase?"

Yes.

" Go ahead then, please, with my thanks..."

The prediction I had made, which I`d scrawled on the scrap of paper, was that the subconscious had created the out-of-phase problem to support the overweight pattern of behaviour - because, as the doctor had said, the gland problem made it much harder for Christine to lose weight. And the point was that the subconscious did not want her to lose weight, since the overweight existed for a good reason.

It gave me some added pleasure to show Christine the jotting subsequently, which pinpointed the understanding her subconscious mind had offered up.

With Christine still in relaxation, I went through the routine of negotiating the disposal of the overweight and skin cancer from her life. The symptoms of the cancer, we were told, would disappear within three months: the symptoms of the overweight would take nine months to vanish, that is, for Christine to reach the weight she would be happy with. I also checked that the confidence problem would vanish as a consequence of the changes the subconscious had agreed to make with regard to these other items.

Christine was my first cancer case. I had read with interest - indeed with awe - the Simontons` seminal book Getting Well Again, which details the use of visualisation and other techniques to effect what is termed a `self-cure`. But I knew that all cures are in an important sense self-cures, and that the road to the cure of any given illness is not a kind of mental or spiritual superhighway that anyone can follow, but a unique and individual pathway along which the sufferer can be guided - if the guide is sensitive, caring and competent. For, as W. B. Yeats has said, `Tread softly, for you tread on my dreams.`

Because we are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little life is rounded with a sleep.

" Subconscious, our work is almost completed, but I wonder if you would be prepared to satisfy my curiosity by answering some additional questions about the nature of cancer?"

Yes.

" Thank you. I fully understand that these answers will be personal to you, and based upon your own individual beliefs...Conscious-Christine, do you have any objection to me finding out some more?"

" No."

" OK. Subconscious mind, are there at this moment any cancerous cells in Christine`s body?"

Yes.

" Are any of those cells actively cancerous right now?"

No.

" Conscious-Christine, do you have an understanding of this?"

"...Yes...My freckly bits are the potentially cancerous cells..."

" Thanks. Subconscious mind, are you in control of the emergence and subsequent spread of any cancer in Christine`s body?"

Yes.

" Are you aware of the term `spontaneous remission`?"

Yes.

" Does the spontaneous remission of cancer in Christine`s body represent your work in taking the cancer symptoms away?"

Yes.

" Have you previously taken the symptoms away because of changes in Christine`s life circumstances?"

Yes.

" Do you approve of, and will you support, the changes that Christine has made in her life; quitting her job and planning to move to the West Country with Mike?"

Yes.

" Subconscious mind, specialists have told Christine that she has no tolerance for sunlight, and that exposure to sunlight in her youth caused damage to her skin: can you confirm the accuracy of these diagnoses?"

Yes.

" They are accurate?"

Yes.

" Subconscious mind, can you choose where in Christine`s body cancer will begin, if you decide cancer serves a useful purpose in Christine`s life?"

No.

" But you can deliberately choose cancer as a pattern of behaviour, is that so?"

Yes.

" Once you had chosen cancer in Christine`s life to serve a purpose, did the cancer appear in the skin because the tendency for the skin cells to become cancerous already existed?"

Yes.

" And was one of the purposes of the overweight pattern of behaviour to help limit the physical damage Christine`s skin cancer would cause?"

Yes.

" So you made good use of the tendency of Christine`s skin to become cancerous?"

Yes.

" All right. Subconscious, I thank you for your co-operation today, and for all of your work in helping Christine to live a happier, healthier, more effective ad more successful life..."

I went on to bring Christine out of hypnosis, and as her eyes opened she smiled, lifted her fist in triumph and said,

" Yes - Yes! I`m going to be me! I like being me! And I`m going to be well!"

Which is all that any healing, orthodox or otherwise, can hope to accomplish. 

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